Table of Contents
Beautiful smachot like these should always center around one theme – gratitude – so I’ll start with the thank yous. There are way too many to list each one individually but I’ll do my best to cover the basics.
First, Hashem. Thank You for continuously bestowing such wondrous miracles on me and my family. I have no idea how Your world works, but for whatever reason You’ve decided to present me with the most incredible gifts and I will be forever indebted to You.
Both mine and Daniel’s parents – for giving us so much support over the last 5 years. Mum and dad, you never questioned the often wild and wacky ways I tried to do all my hishtadlut to get my somewhat older eggs working; just offered your financial backing whether you understood it or not. As well, Daniel and I really appreciated all the times you came to stay, to take care of Golan and fill us up with home-cooked shnitzels and chicken soup. Saba and Savta, for really being there, especially towards the end when I could hardly get off the couch, for hosting me and Golan 100% throughout the chagim, continuously picking up the 4 million pieces that came with the caravilla playmobil you bought Golan that he trashed every day (its ok you can keep it in your apartment), the AMAZING savta home-cooked meals and great food you delivered to me in the hospital probably prepared by Chef Kadosh himself; you definitely facilitated everything for us. Daniel and I are also so thrilled that both sets of parents get on so well together; another huge bracha.
The medical people – especially Dr. Schreiber, Dr. Ben Zeev, Jenny the doula, Noa, and Rabbi Weizman, who were there for me with such patience, before, during and now after the birth; you know what you did for me and my family.
The spiritual supporters – especially Aviva, Bonnie, Lynda, Michal Cohen, Jeanne and Shoshana.
The community of Zayit Benei Beitcha, under the tutelage of Nechama Weiser. Daniel already wants me to have another baby so we can get the incredible food everyone is bringing us; we have meals taken care of til the end of the month which is pretty great for Daniel and Golan since I’ve barely put the kettle on over the last few months. The joy that people have clearly shown to us over this miracle is so apparent; it feels like this little man is everyone’s baby. The Hamalach Hagoel choir courtesy of mishpachat Cohnen was also too beautiful for words. We are so grateful that be”H he’s going to have the zechut of growing up in such an incredible place.
My friends who have been so available and helpful for me and Golan: Shira (for all the maternity clothes); Deborah (we love Tanel so much); Dina (Golan adores you guys); Michal (thanks for sending me the contraction timer and for all the food you made when I broke my ankle); Suzanne (for taking me to the hospital); Ayala (for all the supportive emails); the Moskowitz’s (who we really do feel like are our extended family and have done from the moment we moved here) and so many others I’m sure I’ve omitted so I apologize for that.
Friends who have been more like family and have never wavered from that role, with special mention to all the Clasters. I know that you guys really want to leave Efrat and I totally respect that and for sure only want your happiness, but my truth is that it will create a huge hole for our entire family and I just don’t want you to go. I honestly don’t know how we would have gotten through the last few months without you. It’s not just me who gets on with Keren or Daniel who gets on with Erik, it’s your complete precious unit that has had a hugely positive impact on our lives from that moment 3 years ago when Keren and I met in the street, pregnant with Eldar and Golan, and I felt comfortable enough with her straight away to discuss my recent bowel movements. That really was, the start of a beautiful friendship. We love you guys.
My work colleagues – finding the job at Five Blocks when I did was so good for me – yes the one I interviewed for in my pajamas. Apart from it being a fun place to work, the intellectual stimulation was great for taking my mind off a very unnerving pregnancy. Besides, since the average kid count for you all is around 15, no one batted an eyelid that I was expecting my second. You really helped a lot. Your support during the broken ankle episode was wonderful too and Daniel wants to know why I have to take “maternity leave” at all. See you all soon be”H.
Golanela Moshe – it was really only because of you that I even considered the possibility that I would have the zechut or ability to bring another child into the world. Your sweetness and seemingly over-mature understanding of what mummy needs and how to be the most awesome little boy the world has ever merited to see, is something I will never fathom. I am not a good mummy or a natural on any level, but you have made mothering the easiest and bestest job in the world. I love you to bits.
Last, but absolutely not least, to Daniel. I really don’t know where to begin. Clearly, you and I are totally incompatible. We make absolutely no sense. There have never been two more different individuals. I can’t even say you are from Mars and I am from Venus as that would suggest that at least we hail from the same solar system. But, simultaneous to that fact is the one that I love you so much in so many ways; most of which you’ll probably never even realize. I am so ridiculously proud to be your partner, to have you as my husband. I love how happy you always are; your joie de vivre never gets you down. You have no concept of the negative in life and are constantly striving to put a smile on everyone’s faces around you. You are, without a doubt, the very best father ever and your dedication to your family is unparalleled. No matter how great fathers are, I don’t think any of them would continue a full time business while getting up for every single night feed as you did with Golan for many months and you’re doing now with this one. I am in awe of your energy; in shock and disbelief of how you have never once lost it with Golan, and really feel blessed by the fact that even when you are downstairs in the studio, just knowing you are near can send a shiver of calmness throughout my entire body. The tranquility, peace and stability with which you have provided me; your total belief in me while ignoring all of my panics which you take in your stride, has literally brought me into the world in a way I never thought possible and that was totally lacking in my world for the first 34 years of my life. Thank you for being you; I can’t wait to continue on this new chapter of our journey together… And no, this doesn’t mean you can get your Jacuzzi.
And now, for those of you who know me and are sitting there wondering if you’re going to get the story, here it is.
It began on the 28th December 2009. Well that was after a few months of saying no to fertility treatment and trying acupuncture and Chinese herbs so that I would have more energy and possibly increase my fertility chances that way.
Golani was scheduled for a basic surgery (tonsils and adenoids) the following day. I knew Daniel wouldn’t be around on the 28th and anyway would tell me to quit worrying, so I called in a favour and asked Bonnie if she wouldn’t mind babysitting me that day. “Sure,” she replied, in her totally giving way. “Just let me know what you want to do and we’ll hang out.” Well, knowing that Bonnie is a big grave person, I figured perhaps we could go to kever together to pray for Golani’s safe delivery from surgery. “Why don’t we go to Kever Rachel?” I suggested, figuring it was the closest one and I’d never been there, or at least not for a good decade. She agreed. We went swimming in the morning together, walked the dogs, and then headed out to the kever.
I had no idea that Kever Rachel was a zechut for fertility. I didn’t pray for that anyway. I prayed for Golan. When we got there, Bonnie had another task at hand; to get the red strings for her mother who was scheduled for heart surgery and had requested them, being a big believer in their powers. I was standing on the sidelines when the woman offered me one too. Not at all interested, but somewhat reluctant to refuse the offer from this little old lady with potential witch-like powers, I took one and put it on. I then went to do my heartfelt davening.
BH all was good with Golani on 29th December. 30th December was the date of my last period. I hadn’t been successful in getting pregnant in over a year and a half. I wasn’t desperate since I never saw Golan as an “only” child or that I had “just” one; those words could never be associated with him. He’s fulfilled me in every way possible. And with Daniel and Gal by my side, I didn’t feel deprived. But for him, I really wanted a sibling. There was also a part of me that wanted to experience the miracle again, but could I ask, I wondered.
Well, the story doesn’t end here as Aviva decided I could. For months she was asking me for my name to add to her Tehillim group and I wouldn’t give it. Finally, a few days after Golan’s surgery, he contracted fifth disease and she said she’d add his name, but insisted I give mine and Daniel’s too. So, terrified, I conceded. If I let people daven for me it might happen which also scared me. But I did.
Around exactly the same time I hosted a challah baking workshop in my home through Tamar Ansh (my challah story of meeting Daniel is in ‘A Taste of Challah’). Tamar was doing this workshop to get money for the most amazing organization, Chai L’Adam, which raises much needed funds for those going through medical emergencies who suddenly need a whole load of finances at a very stressful time. If anyone wants to give us a gift, since BH we don’t need anything as we have everything from Golan, donating to this organization would be hugely appreciated and another way you’d be helping us to thank Hashem.
So that pretty much covers it. There are so many sad and tragic times in our lives. But for now, I ask you all to try and just stay in this moment, even for a minute, and really appreciate and enjoy the tremendously large gift (certainly felt like that without an epidural!) Hashem has bestowed on all of clal Yisrael today. Thank you.
First, Hashem. Thank You for continuously bestowing such wondrous miracles on me and my family. I have no idea how Your world works, but for whatever reason You’ve decided to present me with the most incredible gifts and I will be forever indebted to You.
Both mine and Daniel’s parents – for giving us so much support over the last 5 years. Mum and dad, you never questioned the often wild and wacky ways I tried to do all my hishtadlut to get my somewhat older eggs working; just offered your financial backing whether you understood it or not. As well, Daniel and I really appreciated all the times you came to stay, to take care of Golan and fill us up with home-cooked shnitzels and chicken soup. Saba and Savta, for really being there, especially towards the end when I could hardly get off the couch, for hosting me and Golan 100% throughout the chagim, continuously picking up the 4 million pieces that came with the caravilla playmobil you bought Golan that he trashed every day (its ok you can keep it in your apartment), the AMAZING savta home-cooked meals and great food you delivered to me in the hospital probably prepared by Chef Kadosh himself; you definitely facilitated everything for us. Daniel and I are also so thrilled that both sets of parents get on so well together; another huge bracha.
The medical people – especially Dr. Schreiber, Dr. Ben Zeev, Jenny the doula, Noa, and Rabbi Weizman, who were there for me with such patience, before, during and now after the birth; you know what you did for me and my family.
The spiritual supporters – especially Aviva, Bonnie, Lynda, Michal Cohen, Jeanne and Shoshana.
The community of Zayit Benei Beitcha, under the tutelage of Nechama Weiser. Daniel already wants me to have another baby so we can get the incredible food everyone is bringing us; we have meals taken care of til the end of the month which is pretty great for Daniel and Golan since I’ve barely put the kettle on over the last few months. The joy that people have clearly shown to us over this miracle is so apparent; it feels like this little man is everyone’s baby. The Hamalach Hagoel choir courtesy of mishpachat Cohnen was also too beautiful for words. We are so grateful that be”H he’s going to have the zechut of growing up in such an incredible place.
My friends who have been so available and helpful for me and Golan: Shira (for all the maternity clothes); Deborah (we love Tanel so much); Dina (Golan adores you guys); Michal (thanks for sending me the contraction timer and for all the food you made when I broke my ankle); Suzanne (for taking me to the hospital); Ayala (for all the supportive emails); the Moskowitz’s (who we really do feel like are our extended family and have done from the moment we moved here) and so many others I’m sure I’ve omitted so I apologize for that.
Friends who have been more like family and have never wavered from that role, with special mention to all the Clasters. I know that you guys really want to leave Efrat and I totally respect that and for sure only want your happiness, but my truth is that it will create a huge hole for our entire family and I just don’t want you to go. I honestly don’t know how we would have gotten through the last few months without you. It’s not just me who gets on with Keren or Daniel who gets on with Erik, it’s your complete precious unit that has had a hugely positive impact on our lives from that moment 3 years ago when Keren and I met in the street, pregnant with Eldar and Golan, and I felt comfortable enough with her straight away to discuss my recent bowel movements. That really was, the start of a beautiful friendship. We love you guys.
My work colleagues – finding the job at Five Blocks when I did was so good for me – yes the one I interviewed for in my pajamas. Apart from it being a fun place to work, the intellectual stimulation was great for taking my mind off a very unnerving pregnancy. Besides, since the average kid count for you all is around 15, no one batted an eyelid that I was expecting my second. You really helped a lot. Your support during the broken ankle episode was wonderful too and Daniel wants to know why I have to take “maternity leave” at all. See you all soon be”H.
Golanela Moshe – it was really only because of you that I even considered the possibility that I would have the zechut or ability to bring another child into the world. Your sweetness and seemingly over-mature understanding of what mummy needs and how to be the most awesome little boy the world has ever merited to see, is something I will never fathom. I am not a good mummy or a natural on any level, but you have made mothering the easiest and bestest job in the world. I love you to bits.
Last, but absolutely not least, to Daniel. I really don’t know where to begin. Clearly, you and I are totally incompatible. We make absolutely no sense. There have never been two more different individuals. I can’t even say you are from Mars and I am from Venus as that would suggest that at least we hail from the same solar system. But, simultaneous to that fact is the one that I love you so much in so many ways; most of which you’ll probably never even realize. I am so ridiculously proud to be your partner, to have you as my husband. I love how happy you always are; your joie de vivre never gets you down. You have no concept of the negative in life and are constantly striving to put a smile on everyone’s faces around you. You are, without a doubt, the very best father ever and your dedication to your family is unparalleled. No matter how great fathers are, I don’t think any of them would continue a full time business while getting up for every single night feed as you did with Golan for many months and you’re doing now with this one. I am in awe of your energy; in shock and disbelief of how you have never once lost it with Golan, and really feel blessed by the fact that even when you are downstairs in the studio, just knowing you are near can send a shiver of calmness throughout my entire body. The tranquility, peace and stability with which you have provided me; your total belief in me while ignoring all of my panics which you take in your stride, has literally brought me into the world in a way I never thought possible and that was totally lacking in my world for the first 34 years of my life. Thank you for being you; I can’t wait to continue on this new chapter of our journey together… And no, this doesn’t mean you can get your Jacuzzi.
And now, for those of you who know me and are sitting there wondering if you’re going to get the story, here it is.
It began on the 28th December 2009. Well that was after a few months of saying no to fertility treatment and trying acupuncture and Chinese herbs so that I would have more energy and possibly increase my fertility chances that way.
Golani was scheduled for a basic surgery (tonsils and adenoids) the following day. I knew Daniel wouldn’t be around on the 28th and anyway would tell me to quit worrying, so I called in a favour and asked Bonnie if she wouldn’t mind babysitting me that day. “Sure,” she replied, in her totally giving way. “Just let me know what you want to do and we’ll hang out.” Well, knowing that Bonnie is a big grave person, I figured perhaps we could go to kever together to pray for Golani’s safe delivery from surgery. “Why don’t we go to Kever Rachel?” I suggested, figuring it was the closest one and I’d never been there, or at least not for a good decade. She agreed. We went swimming in the morning together, walked the dogs, and then headed out to the kever.
I had no idea that Kever Rachel was a zechut for fertility. I didn’t pray for that anyway. I prayed for Golan. When we got there, Bonnie had another task at hand; to get the red strings for her mother who was scheduled for heart surgery and had requested them, being a big believer in their powers. I was standing on the sidelines when the woman offered me one too. Not at all interested, but somewhat reluctant to refuse the offer from this little old lady with potential witch-like powers, I took one and put it on. I then went to do my heartfelt davening.
BH all was good with Golani on 29th December. 30th December was the date of my last period. I hadn’t been successful in getting pregnant in over a year and a half. I wasn’t desperate since I never saw Golan as an “only” child or that I had “just” one; those words could never be associated with him. He’s fulfilled me in every way possible. And with Daniel and Gal by my side, I didn’t feel deprived. But for him, I really wanted a sibling. There was also a part of me that wanted to experience the miracle again, but could I ask, I wondered.
Well, the story doesn’t end here as Aviva decided I could. For months she was asking me for my name to add to her Tehillim group and I wouldn’t give it. Finally, a few days after Golan’s surgery, he contracted fifth disease and she said she’d add his name, but insisted I give mine and Daniel’s too. So, terrified, I conceded. If I let people daven for me it might happen which also scared me. But I did.
Around exactly the same time I hosted a challah baking workshop in my home through Tamar Ansh (my challah story of meeting Daniel is in ‘A Taste of Challah’). Tamar was doing this workshop to get money for the most amazing organization, Chai L’Adam, which raises much needed funds for those going through medical emergencies who suddenly need a whole load of finances at a very stressful time. If anyone wants to give us a gift, since BH we don’t need anything as we have everything from Golan, donating to this organization would be hugely appreciated and another way you’d be helping us to thank Hashem.
So that pretty much covers it. There are so many sad and tragic times in our lives. But for now, I ask you all to try and just stay in this moment, even for a minute, and really appreciate and enjoy the tremendously large gift (certainly felt like that without an epidural!) Hashem has bestowed on all of clal Yisrael today. Thank you.
The Name
When it became clear that no matter how much bargaining I did with my wife, the name Heinz was not going to be accepted, I had to really start looking into plan B.
Throughout the pregnancy, Emma kept on saying how different the baby felt . With Golan, she hardly ever felt any movement and when she did it was just a mere flutter. This one never stopped and at times she even said the movements caused pain. I wasn’t convinced this would make any difference once the baby was born, but what we both noticed immediately was his physical strength.
He already holds up his head; he fights me when I change his diaper; Emma says he refuses to unlatch after nursing without a battle; he just clearly has strength and is strong-willed. So we both knew we wanted a name to reflect that.
Eitan means strength. It is also a Biblical name, found in Divrei Hayamim 2:6, the son of Zerach and grandson of Judah. Zerach means light and his son Eitan is also used to describe the miracle of Chahanukah of the light from the oil of the lamp that should have only lasted one day, but instead lasted for eight. So in a sense, the strength of Eitan came from the miracle of his father who in our case is Hashem – our collective father.
We chose Aharon for three reasons. First, because of the Biblical reference; second because Aharon was Moshe’s brother (Golan’s other name is Moshe). And third, because one of the things my wife loves about me is the value Aharon is known for – an ohev shalom v’rodef shalom (a lover and chaser of peace).
Luckily for me, I sorta got my wish anyway for naming after a top player. If you take the initials of all our family members – Emma, Golan, Gal, Eitan and Daniel – you get EGGED, which might actually be some kind of deep Kabbalistic reference to The Bus, that being the nickname given to Jerome Bettis, a great former Steelers player.
In all seriousness though, it is mine and Emma’s hope and prayer that Eitan Aharon Sass grows up to be a strong, peace-loving individual with his own personally-developed worthy convictions.
When it became clear that no matter how much bargaining I did with my wife, the name Heinz was not going to be accepted, I had to really start looking into plan B.
Throughout the pregnancy, Emma kept on saying how different the baby felt . With Golan, she hardly ever felt any movement and when she did it was just a mere flutter. This one never stopped and at times she even said the movements caused pain. I wasn’t convinced this would make any difference once the baby was born, but what we both noticed immediately was his physical strength.
He already holds up his head; he fights me when I change his diaper; Emma says he refuses to unlatch after nursing without a battle; he just clearly has strength and is strong-willed. So we both knew we wanted a name to reflect that.
Eitan means strength. It is also a Biblical name, found in Divrei Hayamim 2:6, the son of Zerach and grandson of Judah. Zerach means light and his son Eitan is also used to describe the miracle of Chahanukah of the light from the oil of the lamp that should have only lasted one day, but instead lasted for eight. So in a sense, the strength of Eitan came from the miracle of his father who in our case is Hashem – our collective father.
We chose Aharon for three reasons. First, because of the Biblical reference; second because Aharon was Moshe’s brother (Golan’s other name is Moshe). And third, because one of the things my wife loves about me is the value Aharon is known for – an ohev shalom v’rodef shalom (a lover and chaser of peace).
Luckily for me, I sorta got my wish anyway for naming after a top player. If you take the initials of all our family members – Emma, Golan, Gal, Eitan and Daniel – you get EGGED, which might actually be some kind of deep Kabbalistic reference to The Bus, that being the nickname given to Jerome Bettis, a great former Steelers player.
In all seriousness though, it is mine and Emma’s hope and prayer that Eitan Aharon Sass grows up to be a strong, peace-loving individual with his own personally-developed worthy convictions.
What we discovered after the brit (thanks to Michal Cohen) was that Tishrei is Chodesh Eitanim (Month of Power). Eitan Aharon was born on 28th Tishrei. According to I Kings 8:2, 12, “King Solomon gathered every person of Israel in the month of Eitanim (Tishrei) on the holiday (Sukkot) in the seventh month…for God had said, 'I have built a House for my eternal residence.”
In addition to Aviv, Bul, and Ziv, there is another month name mentioned in the Tanach, Eitanim, which is the month we call Tishrei. The word Eitan means permanent especially in regard to rivers, or ever-flowing, and comes from the root yod-taf-nun. It was probably used from Tishrei because, in Tishrei, just before the rainy season begins, the only rivers still flowing are the ones that always flow.
In Tenach, Tishrei is called "the month of the strong" or "the month of the ancients" (Yerach Ha'eitanim). With respect to the reckoning of "years," Tishrei is the first month of the year (before the giving of the Torah to Israel, Tishrei was the universal first month of the year).
In addition to Aviv, Bul, and Ziv, there is another month name mentioned in the Tanach, Eitanim, which is the month we call Tishrei. The word Eitan means permanent especially in regard to rivers, or ever-flowing, and comes from the root yod-taf-nun. It was probably used from Tishrei because, in Tishrei, just before the rainy season begins, the only rivers still flowing are the ones that always flow.
In Tenach, Tishrei is called "the month of the strong" or "the month of the ancients" (Yerach Ha'eitanim). With respect to the reckoning of "years," Tishrei is the first month of the year (before the giving of the Torah to Israel, Tishrei was the universal first month of the year).
It's true. I'm having a hard time. Eitan Aharon Sass is the most stunning baby to have ever breathed air on this earth but my goodness is he challenging. The constant sleepless nights, the endless screaming during the day for the first two and a half months of his life (which has BH cleared up) and the general exhaustion that goes with having a baby is really getting to me. I've been screaming at my amazingly generous and giving husband and have actually even lost it a couple of times with my gorgeous 3 year old, who is, quite frankly, just being a 3 year old. So what's to be? And why am I going through this?
After a certain amount of contemplation, I have come to the conclusion (when I'm not crying from the sleep deprivation) that Eitan Aharon is a very special, strong, and extremely gifted soul. I believe he has the most beautifully gentle features that will melt even the hardest of hearts. And I believe -- and pray -- he will grow out of this overly-loud phase soon. I think however, that I am supposed to be getting a message here too. One of the advantages to this very challenging little person is how he forces me to possibly be more loving than I've ever been in my life. His needs are great (at least they seem that way on no sleep) but he's asking me to work my mission. One of the best ways of getting him back to sleep (it doesn't always work; nothing does unfortunately!) is being smothered with gentle kisses and having his head gently caressed. He is telling me, in no uncertain terms, that if you are living in this world -- no matter who you are or what tasks you need to complete in your day-to-day life -- you need to do so in a loving way. You need to kiss and caress and hold and comfort. You need to be there, 125%, for your brother, your sister, and indeed anyone in clal yisrael. Yes it's hard. No, it's not fun during those times when all you want to do is curl up or run away or escape. But that challenge is part of life. And with such challenges for sure come the greatest rewards you can never imagine.
And believe me, when you DO manage to comfort someone like that; when it is YOUR kisses and caresses that finally ease the ear-wrenching scream into soft, almost sensually-sounding breathing and a look of total tranquility on his face, then there is no other task in your day-to-day life that can possibly compare to the importance of doing just that.
The special soul and somewhat loud body of Eitan Aharon is coming to tell us that now, more than ever, is the time for tikun; now is the time to stop everything else and just breathe your breath over his eyes to let him know that he is not alone in a fast-becoming scary and dangerous world. I believe he's completely right and has -- at the tender age of 5 months -- nailed it. Let's just hope I have the strength to do this during the sleep-deprived nights that follow and let's just pray that my husband continues to be as incredibly strong and patient as he has been until now.
Besides which, at the end of the difficulties of nurturing this pure life is way easier than the pain encountered when it looked possible his older brother was set to go through life sibling-less.
Amen
After a certain amount of contemplation, I have come to the conclusion (when I'm not crying from the sleep deprivation) that Eitan Aharon is a very special, strong, and extremely gifted soul. I believe he has the most beautifully gentle features that will melt even the hardest of hearts. And I believe -- and pray -- he will grow out of this overly-loud phase soon. I think however, that I am supposed to be getting a message here too. One of the advantages to this very challenging little person is how he forces me to possibly be more loving than I've ever been in my life. His needs are great (at least they seem that way on no sleep) but he's asking me to work my mission. One of the best ways of getting him back to sleep (it doesn't always work; nothing does unfortunately!) is being smothered with gentle kisses and having his head gently caressed. He is telling me, in no uncertain terms, that if you are living in this world -- no matter who you are or what tasks you need to complete in your day-to-day life -- you need to do so in a loving way. You need to kiss and caress and hold and comfort. You need to be there, 125%, for your brother, your sister, and indeed anyone in clal yisrael. Yes it's hard. No, it's not fun during those times when all you want to do is curl up or run away or escape. But that challenge is part of life. And with such challenges for sure come the greatest rewards you can never imagine.
And believe me, when you DO manage to comfort someone like that; when it is YOUR kisses and caresses that finally ease the ear-wrenching scream into soft, almost sensually-sounding breathing and a look of total tranquility on his face, then there is no other task in your day-to-day life that can possibly compare to the importance of doing just that.
The special soul and somewhat loud body of Eitan Aharon is coming to tell us that now, more than ever, is the time for tikun; now is the time to stop everything else and just breathe your breath over his eyes to let him know that he is not alone in a fast-becoming scary and dangerous world. I believe he's completely right and has -- at the tender age of 5 months -- nailed it. Let's just hope I have the strength to do this during the sleep-deprived nights that follow and let's just pray that my husband continues to be as incredibly strong and patient as he has been until now.
Besides which, at the end of the difficulties of nurturing this pure life is way easier than the pain encountered when it looked possible his older brother was set to go through life sibling-less.
Amen
So Eitan Aharon Sass, here we are at the end of the first year of your very special life. While it’s true there have definitely been challenging moments over the last 12 months, as we learn from the Chinese characters, with each “challenge” comes an “opportunity.” And that’s what I feel like I’ve been blessed with, with you.
It took me about 7 attempts to make your cake and even then I came up with cookies that just weren’t what they were meant to be. It took much longer to get you but the difference was, when you did come into being, you were so much more than I ever imagined. The failed baking attempts taught me that you don’t always get what you think you will….indeed, with a bracha (like you) you could actually end up with way more.
You’ve genuinely given me and your daddy – as well as your big brother, your dog and all those who love you – immense moments of increased love, joy, and a supreme amount of giggles and smiles. You’ve blessed us with the privilege to see the caretaker side of Golan; to see the capacity of a patient Gal as you pull on his hair and try to eat his food; to understand what it’s like to be around a baby with tremendous energy and a true zest for life (just like your daddy) and to watch with pride as you learn and develop more and more each day, always with a smile, even when you fall and bang your head in the process.
It took me a while to understand how you needed to be loved and cared for; it didn’t come so naturally to me at first and I made a lot of mistakes that ended up frustrating us both. But when I finally figured out that you didn’t want to do the baby textbook thing of being rocked, driven around or pushed in the stroller for comfort, but just held close, I knew that you and I would forever be extremely close and connected as that’s something I thrive on too.
You certainly have got your very own agenda. From when you were in the womb, until today, you’ve demonstrated your strength and determination in everything you do…and don’t do. No matter what your daddy and I believe to be best for you – like sleeping and eating – you’ll decide exactly when, where and how you’re going to do that, irrespective of our beliefs and intentions.
The day I let you fall out of your stroller is one I’ll never forget. Again your strength was evident as you were completely fine and hardly cried at all. It was like you were saying to me, “it’s okay mummy; I’m just fine; we all make mistakes.” So thank you for that.
No matter how much your daddy and I adore you Eitan, we know that if, given the chance, you would run off somewhere fun with your big brother Golan as it is to him, ultimately, it seems you cleave. This happened almost as soon as you were born and during those months when your cry seemed to penetrate right through my bones, it was that which kept me going. I could never have imagined for a second what immense joy it would give me to see my two children love each other so intently that it’s almost like you guys have your own special language that we’ll never be invited to learn.
Eitan, my wish, hope and bracha for you today is that you continue to smile, to develop beautifully, to love and be loved and to always be the person you were meant to be – energetic, curious, excited by life and fun to be around. Thank you for choosing me to be your mummy.
It took me about 7 attempts to make your cake and even then I came up with cookies that just weren’t what they were meant to be. It took much longer to get you but the difference was, when you did come into being, you were so much more than I ever imagined. The failed baking attempts taught me that you don’t always get what you think you will….indeed, with a bracha (like you) you could actually end up with way more.
You’ve genuinely given me and your daddy – as well as your big brother, your dog and all those who love you – immense moments of increased love, joy, and a supreme amount of giggles and smiles. You’ve blessed us with the privilege to see the caretaker side of Golan; to see the capacity of a patient Gal as you pull on his hair and try to eat his food; to understand what it’s like to be around a baby with tremendous energy and a true zest for life (just like your daddy) and to watch with pride as you learn and develop more and more each day, always with a smile, even when you fall and bang your head in the process.
It took me a while to understand how you needed to be loved and cared for; it didn’t come so naturally to me at first and I made a lot of mistakes that ended up frustrating us both. But when I finally figured out that you didn’t want to do the baby textbook thing of being rocked, driven around or pushed in the stroller for comfort, but just held close, I knew that you and I would forever be extremely close and connected as that’s something I thrive on too.
You certainly have got your very own agenda. From when you were in the womb, until today, you’ve demonstrated your strength and determination in everything you do…and don’t do. No matter what your daddy and I believe to be best for you – like sleeping and eating – you’ll decide exactly when, where and how you’re going to do that, irrespective of our beliefs and intentions.
The day I let you fall out of your stroller is one I’ll never forget. Again your strength was evident as you were completely fine and hardly cried at all. It was like you were saying to me, “it’s okay mummy; I’m just fine; we all make mistakes.” So thank you for that.
No matter how much your daddy and I adore you Eitan, we know that if, given the chance, you would run off somewhere fun with your big brother Golan as it is to him, ultimately, it seems you cleave. This happened almost as soon as you were born and during those months when your cry seemed to penetrate right through my bones, it was that which kept me going. I could never have imagined for a second what immense joy it would give me to see my two children love each other so intently that it’s almost like you guys have your own special language that we’ll never be invited to learn.
Eitan, my wish, hope and bracha for you today is that you continue to smile, to develop beautifully, to love and be loved and to always be the person you were meant to be – energetic, curious, excited by life and fun to be around. Thank you for choosing me to be your mummy.
Eitan, today is your 2nd birthday. It is so fitting that it fell during the middle of Succot – zman simchataynu – as that is so very much your essence. And also how fitting it is that, for those of us who made it to shul this morning, the parsha we read was Vezot Habracha – and this, indeed, - you – is a bracha. I have to admit the first year with you I found to be a challenge, and, still to this day I fail at always sufficiently comprehending your will, but in general, this last year with you has brought so many smiles and giggles to your immediate family and everyone else with whom you come into contact.
When you started at your new gan, I thought I was being clever by warning the ganenets that you are sometimes a shovav – naughty. But each day I came to collect you, your beaming eyes smiling back at me, the ganenets looked at me, like I was the shovav, questioning if I was really sure you were naughty at home. They, like everyone else, had fallen in love with you.
Whilst it’s true your verbal abilities are no chart-toppers, you certainly know how to communicate and boy do you get your desires across. Just as I’ve finally sat myself down with a book or the phone, you have other ideas. You come trotting over, making your little squeak, your arm outstretched beckoning me to follow you. The first few times I made the error of trying to distract you with something else so that I could continue relaxing. But, as we are learning all too quickly, once you’ve made up your mind, there’s no stopping you. I have to confess that it’s not easy for me to refuse you marshmallows when you take me to the junk cupboard and pick them out. And at that point I have to watch as you either take your traditional backward steps or sit on the floor and scream. It’s tough but sometimes mummy and daddy just have to say no.
You’re incredibly cute when I put you to bed for your naps and nighttime sleep. I started singing to you which seemed to calm you down, and then, when I got to the la las in the song you would join in, complimenting the song with loo loos and I would have to concentrate hard to not crack up. Then you would put your fingers out of the crib or press your little face in between the rails so that you could kiss me and giggle.
Your affectionate nature is contagious. Sometimes, seemingly without any warning at all, you’ll just stretch up your arms and grab a cuddle. When you let me go, two seconds later the process is repeated. You do it again and again and again and, truthfully, it could never be too many times.
As we’ve known since the moment you were born, you are obsessed with your big brother. You want to play with him, sit with him, have the same toys as him, the same friends and your favorite game is when you chase each other around the house. Another good friend of yours is Gal. While your aging brother (he’s nearly 64) just wants to sit quietly and be left alone, there’s nothing you enjoy more than chatting to him under the dining room table as he runs for cover.
And of course, when it comes to things you like, we have to mention food. You are an excellent eater, always curious to try new foods and your dexterity is boundless, especially for a kid your age.
All in all Eitan Aharon, we love you more and more each day and are so proud you are our son. Just keep going the way you are and we think you’ll do just fine.
Much love as always, Mummy and Daddy
When you started at your new gan, I thought I was being clever by warning the ganenets that you are sometimes a shovav – naughty. But each day I came to collect you, your beaming eyes smiling back at me, the ganenets looked at me, like I was the shovav, questioning if I was really sure you were naughty at home. They, like everyone else, had fallen in love with you.
Whilst it’s true your verbal abilities are no chart-toppers, you certainly know how to communicate and boy do you get your desires across. Just as I’ve finally sat myself down with a book or the phone, you have other ideas. You come trotting over, making your little squeak, your arm outstretched beckoning me to follow you. The first few times I made the error of trying to distract you with something else so that I could continue relaxing. But, as we are learning all too quickly, once you’ve made up your mind, there’s no stopping you. I have to confess that it’s not easy for me to refuse you marshmallows when you take me to the junk cupboard and pick them out. And at that point I have to watch as you either take your traditional backward steps or sit on the floor and scream. It’s tough but sometimes mummy and daddy just have to say no.
You’re incredibly cute when I put you to bed for your naps and nighttime sleep. I started singing to you which seemed to calm you down, and then, when I got to the la las in the song you would join in, complimenting the song with loo loos and I would have to concentrate hard to not crack up. Then you would put your fingers out of the crib or press your little face in between the rails so that you could kiss me and giggle.
Your affectionate nature is contagious. Sometimes, seemingly without any warning at all, you’ll just stretch up your arms and grab a cuddle. When you let me go, two seconds later the process is repeated. You do it again and again and again and, truthfully, it could never be too many times.
As we’ve known since the moment you were born, you are obsessed with your big brother. You want to play with him, sit with him, have the same toys as him, the same friends and your favorite game is when you chase each other around the house. Another good friend of yours is Gal. While your aging brother (he’s nearly 64) just wants to sit quietly and be left alone, there’s nothing you enjoy more than chatting to him under the dining room table as he runs for cover.
And of course, when it comes to things you like, we have to mention food. You are an excellent eater, always curious to try new foods and your dexterity is boundless, especially for a kid your age.
All in all Eitan Aharon, we love you more and more each day and are so proud you are our son. Just keep going the way you are and we think you’ll do just fine.
Much love as always, Mummy and Daddy
Eitan, at 3 years old you’re quite the big boy. No longer a toddler and certainly not a baby. This is further exemplified by your upsherin – the occasion on when we give you your first haircut. Why are we in fact doing this, and why now? Why not at 2, or at 4? Here’s a little I learned about the minhag – which originated neither from your mummy or daddy’s family. It’s simply a new one we decided to take on, as a way of bringing more simcha into our lives.
Although, during my research, I began to ask, is it completely without familial origin? Interestingly what I found out was that the name upsherin is taken from the German words “sherr” – which means shear and “up” which means off. So maybe after all it was a family minhag, dating back to your savta’s German roots.
Anyway, back to the question of why davka at 3. One answer I found was very interesting. The number three marks the third in a series of “cuts” that symbolize a boy’s movement away from his parents and into the world. The first is when the umbilical cord is cut at birth, the second occurs at 8 days when the foreskin is cut at the brit and then the third is at 3 years old with his hair. The idea is that at three, the boy should be able to be less dependent on his parents and interact more with others. As well, the Hebrew word for haircut, sapar, also means a boundary. Thus the upsherin sets a new standard of behavior; what was acceptable for a baby is now largely out of bounds.
But then I started thinking that if all the above is true, then actually for you Eitan Aharon Sass, my big strong boy born on Caf Chet Tishrei (strength “in your face” by name and nature), we could have probably cut your hair at 3 months. You have always been so strong, independent: strong-willed, strongly-opinionated and so strong physically, that needing to become independent just hasn’t been an issue for you.
Still, being the youngest of the Sass boys (excluding the tortoises of course but the jury is still out as to whether they are boys or girls), I guess I haven’t really wanted you to become all that independent. I mean, all this independence lark is a bit over-rated in my book. Keeping your hair long these three years has reminded me on a daily basis (along with your ever-cute baby voice, your sweet little giggle, and of course the fact that you’ve not yet got potty power), that you are indeed still my baby. Despite the fact that you so want to be Mr. Independent, just like your big brother Golan, you have still not reached the three year mark.
But today I guess all of that changes. Today we cut your hair and there is thus yet another piece of evidence that you are growing up into a big strong boy. Even though really, upsherin or no upsherin, given your name, the date you were born, and most of all your determined personality, gaining independence has just come completely naturally to you.
I bless you today, on your Hebrew birthday, that you continue to grow really just as you have been. Strong willed – hopefully for good, independent and loving everything life has to offer you.
Although, during my research, I began to ask, is it completely without familial origin? Interestingly what I found out was that the name upsherin is taken from the German words “sherr” – which means shear and “up” which means off. So maybe after all it was a family minhag, dating back to your savta’s German roots.
Anyway, back to the question of why davka at 3. One answer I found was very interesting. The number three marks the third in a series of “cuts” that symbolize a boy’s movement away from his parents and into the world. The first is when the umbilical cord is cut at birth, the second occurs at 8 days when the foreskin is cut at the brit and then the third is at 3 years old with his hair. The idea is that at three, the boy should be able to be less dependent on his parents and interact more with others. As well, the Hebrew word for haircut, sapar, also means a boundary. Thus the upsherin sets a new standard of behavior; what was acceptable for a baby is now largely out of bounds.
But then I started thinking that if all the above is true, then actually for you Eitan Aharon Sass, my big strong boy born on Caf Chet Tishrei (strength “in your face” by name and nature), we could have probably cut your hair at 3 months. You have always been so strong, independent: strong-willed, strongly-opinionated and so strong physically, that needing to become independent just hasn’t been an issue for you.
Still, being the youngest of the Sass boys (excluding the tortoises of course but the jury is still out as to whether they are boys or girls), I guess I haven’t really wanted you to become all that independent. I mean, all this independence lark is a bit over-rated in my book. Keeping your hair long these three years has reminded me on a daily basis (along with your ever-cute baby voice, your sweet little giggle, and of course the fact that you’ve not yet got potty power), that you are indeed still my baby. Despite the fact that you so want to be Mr. Independent, just like your big brother Golan, you have still not reached the three year mark.
But today I guess all of that changes. Today we cut your hair and there is thus yet another piece of evidence that you are growing up into a big strong boy. Even though really, upsherin or no upsherin, given your name, the date you were born, and most of all your determined personality, gaining independence has just come completely naturally to you.
I bless you today, on your Hebrew birthday, that you continue to grow really just as you have been. Strong willed – hopefully for good, independent and loving everything life has to offer you.
My very special Eitan, wow what an incredible year it’s been. I feel so privileged to have been given the zechut to have spent so much time cuddling and getting to know you. Even though I had a challenging time with you when you were first born, this year has for sure, more than made up for that rocky start.
Every day last year I got to come home with you and cuddle while you fell asleep in my arms, gently caressing my hair. I would wake up and see your stunning little face, deeply breathing, peaceful, happy, content. What greater wish can a mother have than that? Then I’d bring you a snack and we’d sit and cuddle under my covers as you watched Fireman Sam or Blues Clues. No, probably not the most educational thing I could have done with you, but for sure the most loving, tender, caring and smiley thing I could have done. And I don’t regret it for a moment.
In the morning, I would go to work, or the pool, or grocery shopping and no matter what was going on in my day, I would think about the time I would have with you that afternoon. If I was tired, those thoughts would wake me up; stressed, it would ease my burden, sad, the idea of cuddling you would bring a smile to my face. You have no idea how much those afternoons meant to me.
And now, as you are getting older and more mature, we are bonding in other ways. You always want mummy to be with you, to put you to bed, to get you dressed, to sit next to you, to do your puzzles, to make you petel – warm, not cold from the fridge. You are gentle and sweet and caring with Gal. You love going to your new gan and playing with friends. You had no problem adjusting to a tzaharon program part-time – something you’ve never done before. And you love nothing more than getting a “kol hakavod” for good behaviour.
Something else happened to you Eitan Aharon Sass this past year. Just like your namesake Aharon, you have shown you have peace-loving qualities…at times! It is true that you get into a lot of fights with your brother. But, at the same time, if you see you have hurt someone, or you see mummy is sad, you will do whatever it takes to try to flip that situation around. You will give me kisses and say “mummy is right” even when you don’t quite know what has happened. You just notice something has to be done to rectify a situation and you do it. Again that makes me smile.
Eitan you’re a strong-willed little boy too, just like your daddy. But, while that drives me mad sometimes, at other times I love it – after all, I picked your daddy for those very same traits. It is no coincidence that you were born in the month on Tishrei – Chodesh Eitanim (the month of strength) and, if that weren’t enough, on כח – 28th – the Hebrew for strength. You are so strong, both physically and with your mind and I have to remind myself that it’s a good thing, even when I find it challenging.
Eitan, thank you for loving me. Thank you for being delicious. Thank you for making me so happy so much of the time. And thank you for challenging me. I love you to bits.
Every day last year I got to come home with you and cuddle while you fell asleep in my arms, gently caressing my hair. I would wake up and see your stunning little face, deeply breathing, peaceful, happy, content. What greater wish can a mother have than that? Then I’d bring you a snack and we’d sit and cuddle under my covers as you watched Fireman Sam or Blues Clues. No, probably not the most educational thing I could have done with you, but for sure the most loving, tender, caring and smiley thing I could have done. And I don’t regret it for a moment.
In the morning, I would go to work, or the pool, or grocery shopping and no matter what was going on in my day, I would think about the time I would have with you that afternoon. If I was tired, those thoughts would wake me up; stressed, it would ease my burden, sad, the idea of cuddling you would bring a smile to my face. You have no idea how much those afternoons meant to me.
And now, as you are getting older and more mature, we are bonding in other ways. You always want mummy to be with you, to put you to bed, to get you dressed, to sit next to you, to do your puzzles, to make you petel – warm, not cold from the fridge. You are gentle and sweet and caring with Gal. You love going to your new gan and playing with friends. You had no problem adjusting to a tzaharon program part-time – something you’ve never done before. And you love nothing more than getting a “kol hakavod” for good behaviour.
Something else happened to you Eitan Aharon Sass this past year. Just like your namesake Aharon, you have shown you have peace-loving qualities…at times! It is true that you get into a lot of fights with your brother. But, at the same time, if you see you have hurt someone, or you see mummy is sad, you will do whatever it takes to try to flip that situation around. You will give me kisses and say “mummy is right” even when you don’t quite know what has happened. You just notice something has to be done to rectify a situation and you do it. Again that makes me smile.
Eitan you’re a strong-willed little boy too, just like your daddy. But, while that drives me mad sometimes, at other times I love it – after all, I picked your daddy for those very same traits. It is no coincidence that you were born in the month on Tishrei – Chodesh Eitanim (the month of strength) and, if that weren’t enough, on כח – 28th – the Hebrew for strength. You are so strong, both physically and with your mind and I have to remind myself that it’s a good thing, even when I find it challenging.
Eitan, thank you for loving me. Thank you for being delicious. Thank you for making me so happy so much of the time. And thank you for challenging me. I love you to bits.
I had an epiphany from Eitan – my nearly 5-year old son yesterday. “What are you doing?” I asked curiously as I saw him bend down in the road that was cordoned off for our end-of-summer street BBQ. “Mummy I’m kissing it….because I love eretz Yisrael,” with perfectly rolled reishis and not a second of questioning that what he was doing was anything out of the ordinary.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Israel recently. That it’s hard. That a lot of discussions I have with friends are filled with the difficult life we have here. That we are scared of Arabs and terrorism. That it’s pretty much impossible to make a buck here without breaking your back. That getting any kind of financial security for ourselves or our children is simply little more than a pipe dream.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this because my recent TV viewing has moved over to period dramas. A lot of these shows focus on connections or elements of World War II and the swastika is a common image. “Heil Hitler” can be heard in snippets amid the romantic drama that I enjoy. It’s hard to not think about what things were like for our fellow Jews back in the 1940s, even before they were carted off to concentration camps or shot to death.
And with that has come some true education for me. Of course I know about the atrocities of the Holocaust and I read at least weekly stories of anti-semitism in the country I used to call home. Of course I know that when you go to America it’s really not so simple to meet up with a friend for a quick burger without having to explain the religious or even Jewish element preventing you from doing so. And of course I know that Israel is truly a great country in so many ways.
But the question that occurred to me as I watched Eitan delight in kissing the road was when did we forget to be grateful on a daily basis? When did we stop realizing that we have our own land – a land just for Jews as opposed to living in a land that does whatever it can to be rid of Jews?
No it’s not the easiest place financially to make it. Yes it has a lot of problems. But when I envision those who lived through the wars and think how they would do what Eitan did last night every single day if they had the opportunity to live here, I find myself a little ashamed. I’m ashamed that I’m not living here with every breath and every bit of enthusiasm and every tiny part of gratitude to Hashem who let this happen for me.
I shouldn’t feel too bad though. I should take it as a lesson. And we are told that it is our children who will ultimately teach us. As we read: “And all your children will be students of Hashem, and they will have peace. [In this instance], do not read banayikh, [your children], but bonayikh, [your builders]. “There is abundant peace for the lovers of your Torah and there is no stumbling block for them.”
In other words it will be our children who will teach us, our children who will build for us when we forget the gift and it is us who are zocheh to learn fromthem in our amazing eretz Yisrael.
Thank you Eitan.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Israel recently. That it’s hard. That a lot of discussions I have with friends are filled with the difficult life we have here. That we are scared of Arabs and terrorism. That it’s pretty much impossible to make a buck here without breaking your back. That getting any kind of financial security for ourselves or our children is simply little more than a pipe dream.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this because my recent TV viewing has moved over to period dramas. A lot of these shows focus on connections or elements of World War II and the swastika is a common image. “Heil Hitler” can be heard in snippets amid the romantic drama that I enjoy. It’s hard to not think about what things were like for our fellow Jews back in the 1940s, even before they were carted off to concentration camps or shot to death.
And with that has come some true education for me. Of course I know about the atrocities of the Holocaust and I read at least weekly stories of anti-semitism in the country I used to call home. Of course I know that when you go to America it’s really not so simple to meet up with a friend for a quick burger without having to explain the religious or even Jewish element preventing you from doing so. And of course I know that Israel is truly a great country in so many ways.
But the question that occurred to me as I watched Eitan delight in kissing the road was when did we forget to be grateful on a daily basis? When did we stop realizing that we have our own land – a land just for Jews as opposed to living in a land that does whatever it can to be rid of Jews?
No it’s not the easiest place financially to make it. Yes it has a lot of problems. But when I envision those who lived through the wars and think how they would do what Eitan did last night every single day if they had the opportunity to live here, I find myself a little ashamed. I’m ashamed that I’m not living here with every breath and every bit of enthusiasm and every tiny part of gratitude to Hashem who let this happen for me.
I shouldn’t feel too bad though. I should take it as a lesson. And we are told that it is our children who will ultimately teach us. As we read: “And all your children will be students of Hashem, and they will have peace. [In this instance], do not read banayikh, [your children], but bonayikh, [your builders]. “There is abundant peace for the lovers of your Torah and there is no stumbling block for them.”
In other words it will be our children who will teach us, our children who will build for us when we forget the gift and it is us who are zocheh to learn fromthem in our amazing eretz Yisrael.
Thank you Eitan.
Eitan: The Child That Binds
My dear, beautiful, long-eyelashed, round-cheeked, Eitan,
Today you are five years old. You continue to get cuter and funnier as each day passes. You love to be the life and soul of the party so it’s quite fitting that this year your English birthday falls out on Isru Chag, which literally means “bind the festival,” as in “let’s keep this party going.”
You give the best, tiny, soft little kisses. You are always up for a cuddle and you still love to come in my bed and snuggle all night, even if half the time you are enjoying your gymnastics between daddy and me. We never send you back to your bed because you are just too delicious and we don’t want to part from you either…you bind us in your acrobatic way!
Since the day you were born you were obsessed with your big brother Golan. Although sometimes that irritates him, you just can’t get enough of him. I was told by people who brought you home from summer camp each day that you always made something for yourself and Golan. Whenever you ask for a beitzat hafta’ah it’s always on the condition that we also get “one for Golan.” When I asked you what names I should add to your party invitation list, you insisted I put Golan’s name down too. Everything he does you want to do and you think he’s just awesome.
It’s probably down to you that we do the “family hug.” No matter what’s going on, even if we are all upset, it’ll be you that usually calls for the “family hug,” again, binding us. And because of that we now have a rule in our family that if anyone calls it, we all have to participate in it.
Your love for Gal knows no bounds. You always want to hug him and kiss him and you care very much for him. Indeed, it is often you who asks about Gal when the rest of us may forget him, like if we go away for a night. You are very caring and sweet.
When mummy gets upset you seem to get it. You stop your mischievous behavior (not always) and get on with the task at hand (usually cleaning up). You don’t get frazzled by me at all and you just do what you can to make the situation right…re-binding the fragments of the family.
It’s true you can be a bit of a handful and sometimes it can be extremely frustrating. That’s something we need to work on. But you’re so fun loving, energetic and full of beans that we can’t help but want to spend time with you. In fact, when you missed gan for two days last week and daddy took you back on the third, all your friends ran up to you as they’d missed you so much.
You love grandma, papa, saba and savta and always want to spend time with them. You often ask when you’re going to see them next. And they love you too…you are after all, the youngest grandchild on each side.
Sometimes I do feel that I baby you. I guess it’s because you are my youngest. But it’s also because you have such a cuteness about you that I can’t help it. I hope that even when you’re 99 you still have that wonderful feature.
Thank you for choosing me to be your mum and daddy to be your dad. Thank you for truly completing our family. Although there were 3 whole years when it was just mummy, daddy, Gal and Golan, I cannot imagine life without you in it. You are the strength – Eitan – that helps us along our way and the isru – that binds us together with one big “family hug.”
I love you always, mummy.
My dear, beautiful, long-eyelashed, round-cheeked, Eitan,
Today you are five years old. You continue to get cuter and funnier as each day passes. You love to be the life and soul of the party so it’s quite fitting that this year your English birthday falls out on Isru Chag, which literally means “bind the festival,” as in “let’s keep this party going.”
You give the best, tiny, soft little kisses. You are always up for a cuddle and you still love to come in my bed and snuggle all night, even if half the time you are enjoying your gymnastics between daddy and me. We never send you back to your bed because you are just too delicious and we don’t want to part from you either…you bind us in your acrobatic way!
Since the day you were born you were obsessed with your big brother Golan. Although sometimes that irritates him, you just can’t get enough of him. I was told by people who brought you home from summer camp each day that you always made something for yourself and Golan. Whenever you ask for a beitzat hafta’ah it’s always on the condition that we also get “one for Golan.” When I asked you what names I should add to your party invitation list, you insisted I put Golan’s name down too. Everything he does you want to do and you think he’s just awesome.
It’s probably down to you that we do the “family hug.” No matter what’s going on, even if we are all upset, it’ll be you that usually calls for the “family hug,” again, binding us. And because of that we now have a rule in our family that if anyone calls it, we all have to participate in it.
Your love for Gal knows no bounds. You always want to hug him and kiss him and you care very much for him. Indeed, it is often you who asks about Gal when the rest of us may forget him, like if we go away for a night. You are very caring and sweet.
When mummy gets upset you seem to get it. You stop your mischievous behavior (not always) and get on with the task at hand (usually cleaning up). You don’t get frazzled by me at all and you just do what you can to make the situation right…re-binding the fragments of the family.
It’s true you can be a bit of a handful and sometimes it can be extremely frustrating. That’s something we need to work on. But you’re so fun loving, energetic and full of beans that we can’t help but want to spend time with you. In fact, when you missed gan for two days last week and daddy took you back on the third, all your friends ran up to you as they’d missed you so much.
You love grandma, papa, saba and savta and always want to spend time with them. You often ask when you’re going to see them next. And they love you too…you are after all, the youngest grandchild on each side.
Sometimes I do feel that I baby you. I guess it’s because you are my youngest. But it’s also because you have such a cuteness about you that I can’t help it. I hope that even when you’re 99 you still have that wonderful feature.
Thank you for choosing me to be your mum and daddy to be your dad. Thank you for truly completing our family. Although there were 3 whole years when it was just mummy, daddy, Gal and Golan, I cannot imagine life without you in it. You are the strength – Eitan – that helps us along our way and the isru – that binds us together with one big “family hug.”
I love you always, mummy.
My yummy Eitan,
How many times a day can I tell you how delicious you are? How many times a day can I tell you I love you? How many times a day do I tell you you’re the cutest thing ever?
Even if it’s a million it still feels like it’s not enough. At 6 years old you’re still the cutest thing ever, so loving, so affectionate and so much fun. You love hugging mummy and the feeling is mutual. Rather than put you back to your own bed if you come join us in the middle of the night, I not-so-secretly look forward to the cuddly addition. Even when you’re sick and you get so close to me and breathe your hot firey breath all over me, I can’t help but think you’re the mushiest, most delicious, precious 6-year old ever.
It’s funny, sometimes I think you’re a total copy of your daddy. You make out like you’re not sensitive and don’t have feelings when it comes to other’s pain, but then you’ll do something to completely contradict that. But there again, daddy is like that too. For example, when we went to Eilat for Chanukah last year, and we unpacked, both you and Golan took out your respective teddy bears.
“Oh no,” I remarked half-jokingly, “I left mine – Eeyore – at home.” Not a minute went by before you rushed to my aide, holding Spike in your hand and sincerely offered, “here mummy, take Spike.” I melted.
When you started at your new Gan you were immediately loved by both kids and teachers. Even though your teachers had thoroughly enjoyed teaching Golan a few years earlier – and you guys are so very different – from the first day your teacher told me how wonderful you were and how much you really enjoyed just doing everything!
You always want to learn new things. You are smart and pick things up easily. Doing English homework with you is a true joy as you do it all so nicely and it seems like you enjoy it.
You started a new tzaharon this year. Despite knowing no one (including the teacher!) you took to it like a duck to water. More than that, you totally melted her heart, when, on the very first day there you said – after your lunch of chicken and mashed potato – “thank you for the lovely lunch.” She said you totally took her heart and that no one had ever said that to her. She made an example of you to the other kids, telling them how they should learn from your example.
As a typical for kids your age, you love parties. You love presents and it still amuses both daddy and me how you study that Lego book on a daily basis. Not only are you totally obsessed with what new legos you prepare for mummy and daddy to buy for your birthday, you have managed to pretty much memorize the entire book. You love reading and you love looking at books and I love nothing more than on a Friday night doing “feet to feet” with you whereby we lie on the couch with our feet touching, a blanket over us, reading our respective magazines.
Eitan you’re an awesome kid. I love you so much. I love how you love your brother and I love how much joy and simcha you bring to our family. Thank you for being you and I hope you have the best birthday yet!
How many times a day can I tell you how delicious you are? How many times a day can I tell you I love you? How many times a day do I tell you you’re the cutest thing ever?
Even if it’s a million it still feels like it’s not enough. At 6 years old you’re still the cutest thing ever, so loving, so affectionate and so much fun. You love hugging mummy and the feeling is mutual. Rather than put you back to your own bed if you come join us in the middle of the night, I not-so-secretly look forward to the cuddly addition. Even when you’re sick and you get so close to me and breathe your hot firey breath all over me, I can’t help but think you’re the mushiest, most delicious, precious 6-year old ever.
It’s funny, sometimes I think you’re a total copy of your daddy. You make out like you’re not sensitive and don’t have feelings when it comes to other’s pain, but then you’ll do something to completely contradict that. But there again, daddy is like that too. For example, when we went to Eilat for Chanukah last year, and we unpacked, both you and Golan took out your respective teddy bears.
“Oh no,” I remarked half-jokingly, “I left mine – Eeyore – at home.” Not a minute went by before you rushed to my aide, holding Spike in your hand and sincerely offered, “here mummy, take Spike.” I melted.
When you started at your new Gan you were immediately loved by both kids and teachers. Even though your teachers had thoroughly enjoyed teaching Golan a few years earlier – and you guys are so very different – from the first day your teacher told me how wonderful you were and how much you really enjoyed just doing everything!
You always want to learn new things. You are smart and pick things up easily. Doing English homework with you is a true joy as you do it all so nicely and it seems like you enjoy it.
You started a new tzaharon this year. Despite knowing no one (including the teacher!) you took to it like a duck to water. More than that, you totally melted her heart, when, on the very first day there you said – after your lunch of chicken and mashed potato – “thank you for the lovely lunch.” She said you totally took her heart and that no one had ever said that to her. She made an example of you to the other kids, telling them how they should learn from your example.
As a typical for kids your age, you love parties. You love presents and it still amuses both daddy and me how you study that Lego book on a daily basis. Not only are you totally obsessed with what new legos you prepare for mummy and daddy to buy for your birthday, you have managed to pretty much memorize the entire book. You love reading and you love looking at books and I love nothing more than on a Friday night doing “feet to feet” with you whereby we lie on the couch with our feet touching, a blanket over us, reading our respective magazines.
Eitan you’re an awesome kid. I love you so much. I love how you love your brother and I love how much joy and simcha you bring to our family. Thank you for being you and I hope you have the best birthday yet!
My dear Eitan, on the occasion of your 7th Birthday
Yes, this day has finally arrived. A day you’ve been talking about – literally almost every day – since your 6th birthday. Because you know that in the Sass house we take birthdays very seriously. Almost as seriously as we take loving you.
BH it’s been another awesome year with you. You’ve grown up and are now in Kita Aleph, going to school like a big boy with your older brother Golan. You even have a wiggly tooth. But despite that growth you continue to show me your little boy side which (other than the tantrums!) I absolutely adore. You’re probably the most affectionate member of this family and I will never, ever, ever get tired of your hugs and kisses.
Since last year you’ve also developed a wonderful inner circle of friends. Between, Leeam, Ilan and the twins, it’s clear you’re very loved and respected among your peers. In fact, on Rosh Hashanah your friends were so disappointed you weren’t around, they didn’t even believe their parents and I heard that on more than one occasion there were knocks at our door with the hopes of seeing your smiley face!
You’ve always been a popular little kid but you still know who loves you the most deeply, and forever. For example, when we have been to Tel Aviv in the past, it often takes us a while to get anywhere as you are often stopped along the hallways of the hotel with people wishing to greet you. At those moments though you’re not all that interested, as, well, you’re with mummy and the love you show to me seems to be limitless.
I love that you and I indulge each other’s creative sides. The time I took off from work over your summer break making all those Mr. Men characters together was so much fun. I also loved watching you make your “succah within a succah” and especially enjoyed watching you bring in Ariel (Rafi refused!) as one of your succah-decorator-workers! Good job – learning how to delegate is an important life skill.
Having your own room was a big step but you seemed to take it in your stride. Although, how much time you actually spend in there – at night – is another matter! Most nights you are back and forth from your bed to mine at least twice. Still, during the day I see that you enjoy bringing your friends to your own “space.”
You’ve shown a lot of smarts over the last year too. Daddy and I continue to be quite astounded by your memory of the most intricate details and you’ve taken to school like a duck to water with your teacher already singing your praises in the first few weeks.
So overall Eitan Aharon Sass all I can summarize like this: on this day, your much-awaited and anticipated 7th birthday, just continue as you are and may Hashem bless you to carry on thriving and developing even more in your 8th year.
Love you lots and lots
Mummy
Yes, this day has finally arrived. A day you’ve been talking about – literally almost every day – since your 6th birthday. Because you know that in the Sass house we take birthdays very seriously. Almost as seriously as we take loving you.
BH it’s been another awesome year with you. You’ve grown up and are now in Kita Aleph, going to school like a big boy with your older brother Golan. You even have a wiggly tooth. But despite that growth you continue to show me your little boy side which (other than the tantrums!) I absolutely adore. You’re probably the most affectionate member of this family and I will never, ever, ever get tired of your hugs and kisses.
Since last year you’ve also developed a wonderful inner circle of friends. Between, Leeam, Ilan and the twins, it’s clear you’re very loved and respected among your peers. In fact, on Rosh Hashanah your friends were so disappointed you weren’t around, they didn’t even believe their parents and I heard that on more than one occasion there were knocks at our door with the hopes of seeing your smiley face!
You’ve always been a popular little kid but you still know who loves you the most deeply, and forever. For example, when we have been to Tel Aviv in the past, it often takes us a while to get anywhere as you are often stopped along the hallways of the hotel with people wishing to greet you. At those moments though you’re not all that interested, as, well, you’re with mummy and the love you show to me seems to be limitless.
I love that you and I indulge each other’s creative sides. The time I took off from work over your summer break making all those Mr. Men characters together was so much fun. I also loved watching you make your “succah within a succah” and especially enjoyed watching you bring in Ariel (Rafi refused!) as one of your succah-decorator-workers! Good job – learning how to delegate is an important life skill.
Having your own room was a big step but you seemed to take it in your stride. Although, how much time you actually spend in there – at night – is another matter! Most nights you are back and forth from your bed to mine at least twice. Still, during the day I see that you enjoy bringing your friends to your own “space.”
You’ve shown a lot of smarts over the last year too. Daddy and I continue to be quite astounded by your memory of the most intricate details and you’ve taken to school like a duck to water with your teacher already singing your praises in the first few weeks.
So overall Eitan Aharon Sass all I can summarize like this: on this day, your much-awaited and anticipated 7th birthday, just continue as you are and may Hashem bless you to carry on thriving and developing even more in your 8th year.
Love you lots and lots
Mummy
Eitan you are 8!!!! Such a special number for an insanely special boy. Daddy’s famous 8-ball; 8 days before a brit and many other significant events. But none of those can hold a candle up to your specialness.
This year has been a big one for you. You have now had a whole year in school and you’re journeying on to second grade with a whole lot less friends but are still thriving. You are incredibly mature and know your own mind. That was especially evident when – despite your best buddies changing schools – you decided that you wanted to stay….for the hot meals!
We were proud of your decision as it showed strength of character and ability to know your own mind. It was also good as it was on the same page as your form room teacher who had the same idea – why fix something that’s not broken? And you stayed and you are gradually making new friends. Actually you’re great at making friends as we saw that one time you got invited to a very exclusive Laser Tag birthday party from a kid you’d never even mentioned to us before! And your old friends still love you so much that they sometimes even show up here unannounced…when you’re not even here! They obviously see in you what we do…fun, loving, funny and entertaining.
You’re starting new chugim this year too; from dog training and animal therapy to cooking with the other 2 musketeers; continuing with piano and hopefully reading books with mummy you’ve got a packed year ahead. But I have no doubt you’ll thrive with it all as you love to be kept busy, even voluntarily doing workbooks over the summer vacation.
You love animals. You’ve been extremely thrilled with the new addition to our family – Junior – and, as in your sense of responsibility with Gal, you take both dogs now for a walk. You are kind and gentle with them and treat them with respect.
You’ve had a great time with Saba and Savta since they’ve been here for the chagim. You thoroughly enjoyed the animal museum and the light show they took you too; and you worked hard on not fighting with your brother; kol hakavod to you.
Your lego building skills are continuously developing and you have mummy and daddy in awe as you build all sorts of really cool things like games, a succah, a dog house with a door and very large complicated lego sets with the help of your big brother Golan. You have no problem spending hours with your creations and that shows intelligence and perseverance.
Perhaps what has made my heart melt the most though is how you are with me. When I’m sad you immediatelypick up on it and when things are tough and challenging for me personally you just want to comfort me. Now you have to let me do that for you also, when you are feeling overwhelmed!
Eitan Aharon Sass, I do hope this year just gets even better for you and you continue to do what you’re doing so well – knowing when to be serious and sit down and learn and also having genuine, real, hard fun, make people around you laugh, be gentle, kind and considerate with animals and loving to mummy, daddy and Golan.
We love you VERY much and are so proud to be your parents.
This year has been a big one for you. You have now had a whole year in school and you’re journeying on to second grade with a whole lot less friends but are still thriving. You are incredibly mature and know your own mind. That was especially evident when – despite your best buddies changing schools – you decided that you wanted to stay….for the hot meals!
We were proud of your decision as it showed strength of character and ability to know your own mind. It was also good as it was on the same page as your form room teacher who had the same idea – why fix something that’s not broken? And you stayed and you are gradually making new friends. Actually you’re great at making friends as we saw that one time you got invited to a very exclusive Laser Tag birthday party from a kid you’d never even mentioned to us before! And your old friends still love you so much that they sometimes even show up here unannounced…when you’re not even here! They obviously see in you what we do…fun, loving, funny and entertaining.
You’re starting new chugim this year too; from dog training and animal therapy to cooking with the other 2 musketeers; continuing with piano and hopefully reading books with mummy you’ve got a packed year ahead. But I have no doubt you’ll thrive with it all as you love to be kept busy, even voluntarily doing workbooks over the summer vacation.
You love animals. You’ve been extremely thrilled with the new addition to our family – Junior – and, as in your sense of responsibility with Gal, you take both dogs now for a walk. You are kind and gentle with them and treat them with respect.
You’ve had a great time with Saba and Savta since they’ve been here for the chagim. You thoroughly enjoyed the animal museum and the light show they took you too; and you worked hard on not fighting with your brother; kol hakavod to you.
Your lego building skills are continuously developing and you have mummy and daddy in awe as you build all sorts of really cool things like games, a succah, a dog house with a door and very large complicated lego sets with the help of your big brother Golan. You have no problem spending hours with your creations and that shows intelligence and perseverance.
Perhaps what has made my heart melt the most though is how you are with me. When I’m sad you immediatelypick up on it and when things are tough and challenging for me personally you just want to comfort me. Now you have to let me do that for you also, when you are feeling overwhelmed!
Eitan Aharon Sass, I do hope this year just gets even better for you and you continue to do what you’re doing so well – knowing when to be serious and sit down and learn and also having genuine, real, hard fun, make people around you laugh, be gentle, kind and considerate with animals and loving to mummy, daddy and Golan.
We love you VERY much and are so proud to be your parents.
Dear Eitan
Today you are 9 and you are as beautiful and wondrous as all of Hashem’s creations. It’s insane that at this age you are STILL so cute and everyone who meets you feels the same. I can’t get over your delicious, overabundant cuteness.
I love the things you come out with, quite randomly. Just the other day you came from baseball and said to me:
“Mummy, do you know what I was thinking just now while I was at baseball?”
“No, what were you thinking?”
“How you’re the best mummy in the world.”
“What made you think that?” I asked
“Because you are,” you replied simply.
I also love how funny you are…naturally. You come out with the most random, funny things, indicative of your memory and smarts. One example of this was whenever I discuss memories of the time we spent in Italy for Saba’s 80th birthday – be it the taxi boats in Venice, the water park in Tuscany or all the ice-creams you guys ate – you’ll immediately say, “Yeah when Justin’s lasagna didn’t make it.” We had all made lasagna at the Sass cooking workshop and Justin’s was the only one that wasn’t served as he had created his ultra-thin and was deemed unedible.
The funniest comment though had to be when one day you looked at me, paused and simply asked, “Mummy, do you shed?” I have no idea where you come up with these things but what I do know is that it is the result of a deep, intelligent thought process. I can’t wait to hear your future contemplations.
So bright and so insightful we were in the car when you told me that the song playing on my music station was about how Ben Gurion saved the lives on Jews. The next song – one of my favourites – you told to skip.
“Why?” I asked.
“We can’t listen to it today because it’s not Yom Shishi” you dogmatically insisted.
I love your relationship with Rafi and Ariel. You guys really are The 3 Musketeers. It’s true we are a small family but I feel that their presence kinda makes us into a bigger one. Both you and Golan have learned to share a lot more due to this adopted brother scenario. It’s also fun to just watch the 3 of you play for hours on end, especially on Shabbatot.
And talking of Shabbatot, really because of you we do the parsha each week. And it was you who inspired me to create our own book, together. Thank you for doing the drawings with me every Friday; I actually look forward to that.
Indeed, Shabbat really is special to you. From making delicious challot with daddy every week to encouraging parsha discussions at our table as well as family “question time,” you’ve subtly become the backbone of making Efrat Shabbat truly wonderful and what they were designed to be – family time, relaxation, fun, celebration and yummy food. Thank you.
We were thrilled to get the whatsapp message from your teacher. She wrote:
“Hi Eitan’s mummy. I would love to call you to tell you how what an amazing boy Eitan is in the classroom. Let me know when it’s good for you and if not today, just know that he is such a hardworking, quiet, gentle child who behaves in a mature and good way in the classroom.”
Wow. What could possibly be better? You bring us such nachas. You bring us such joy. We love you more than you’ll ever know and wish you a truly happy 9th birthday and we hope you got all the presents you wished for.
Today you are 9 and you are as beautiful and wondrous as all of Hashem’s creations. It’s insane that at this age you are STILL so cute and everyone who meets you feels the same. I can’t get over your delicious, overabundant cuteness.
I love the things you come out with, quite randomly. Just the other day you came from baseball and said to me:
“Mummy, do you know what I was thinking just now while I was at baseball?”
“No, what were you thinking?”
“How you’re the best mummy in the world.”
“What made you think that?” I asked
“Because you are,” you replied simply.
I also love how funny you are…naturally. You come out with the most random, funny things, indicative of your memory and smarts. One example of this was whenever I discuss memories of the time we spent in Italy for Saba’s 80th birthday – be it the taxi boats in Venice, the water park in Tuscany or all the ice-creams you guys ate – you’ll immediately say, “Yeah when Justin’s lasagna didn’t make it.” We had all made lasagna at the Sass cooking workshop and Justin’s was the only one that wasn’t served as he had created his ultra-thin and was deemed unedible.
The funniest comment though had to be when one day you looked at me, paused and simply asked, “Mummy, do you shed?” I have no idea where you come up with these things but what I do know is that it is the result of a deep, intelligent thought process. I can’t wait to hear your future contemplations.
So bright and so insightful we were in the car when you told me that the song playing on my music station was about how Ben Gurion saved the lives on Jews. The next song – one of my favourites – you told to skip.
“Why?” I asked.
“We can’t listen to it today because it’s not Yom Shishi” you dogmatically insisted.
I love your relationship with Rafi and Ariel. You guys really are The 3 Musketeers. It’s true we are a small family but I feel that their presence kinda makes us into a bigger one. Both you and Golan have learned to share a lot more due to this adopted brother scenario. It’s also fun to just watch the 3 of you play for hours on end, especially on Shabbatot.
And talking of Shabbatot, really because of you we do the parsha each week. And it was you who inspired me to create our own book, together. Thank you for doing the drawings with me every Friday; I actually look forward to that.
Indeed, Shabbat really is special to you. From making delicious challot with daddy every week to encouraging parsha discussions at our table as well as family “question time,” you’ve subtly become the backbone of making Efrat Shabbat truly wonderful and what they were designed to be – family time, relaxation, fun, celebration and yummy food. Thank you.
We were thrilled to get the whatsapp message from your teacher. She wrote:
“Hi Eitan’s mummy. I would love to call you to tell you how what an amazing boy Eitan is in the classroom. Let me know when it’s good for you and if not today, just know that he is such a hardworking, quiet, gentle child who behaves in a mature and good way in the classroom.”
Wow. What could possibly be better? You bring us such nachas. You bring us such joy. We love you more than you’ll ever know and wish you a truly happy 9th birthday and we hope you got all the presents you wished for.
My dear Eitan,
No more single digits as today you are 10!!!!! You continue to make everyone laugh and still are out-of-control cute.
Over this year you have become very responsible and mature. You take very good care of Gracie, walking her every morning. You love when she sleeps in your bed, even as much as she loves sleeping with you…so much so that she even comes in on her own when we sing Hamalach Hagoel to you! She is a source of constant comfort and companionship and we often find the two of you snuggled up on your pillow listening to “Story time with Alexa.” It’s adorable.
Since the beginning of coronacation, you have become my walking partner. Beginning in the first seger we got into quite a nice routine of firstly davening together and then taking Gracie on the path. When things eased up and you were back at school it got changed to our Friday morning minhag. We walked on the path, or up the hill, to the makolet. You went in first while I watched Gracie and chose a treat and then I went in to pay for it and get the rest of the groceries. We had some fun, interesting and weird chats during those walks. And then we walked home together.
We also made up a bunch of silly songs on our travails. Here is one that I remember:
First is the fastest
Second is the nastiest
Third is the one with the hairy mask
Fourth is the trier
Fifth is the cryer
Sixth is the one who’s the hairy liar
Seven has the darts
Eight has the farts
Nine is the one with the hairy a**s
The other thing I love doing with you is craft projects. It’s always so cool how you love creating things as that’s what mummy loves doing also. And then of course on Friday night when you select a Mr. Men book for me to read. Even when I’m tired I still love that you do that. As you enjoy something that I enjoyed in my childhood so very much so it connects me back to that.
In the beginning of coronocation when you would speak to the grandparents on the phone I feared you were not going to be good on the phone. All you said was “yep,” about 10 times and then hung up. But – while it took a little time – now I can honestly say I’m proud of how you can hold a decent conversation with them. They love hearing from you.
You’re pretty smart Eitan. You also have an amazing poker face. You know when you’ve done wrong but you’re a determined little thing which can be both good and bad. Sometimes you are so dead set on getting what you want that you just refuse to let up. That can be pretty exhausting for mummy and daddy but at the same time, pretty impressive at how strong-willed you are. The only advice I would have is, keep with that for sure, but use it for the good. Use it to succeed. Apply it to your piano playing (which by the way is really improving); use it when you defend your friends and your brother (who you love so so much) and find a way for it to make people happy.
Eitan Aharon Sass, you’re a great son, an amazing grandson, a good friend and a loyal dog owner. Keep going just as you are and remember, you’re never too old for kisses and hugs. I love you so much!
No more single digits as today you are 10!!!!! You continue to make everyone laugh and still are out-of-control cute.
Over this year you have become very responsible and mature. You take very good care of Gracie, walking her every morning. You love when she sleeps in your bed, even as much as she loves sleeping with you…so much so that she even comes in on her own when we sing Hamalach Hagoel to you! She is a source of constant comfort and companionship and we often find the two of you snuggled up on your pillow listening to “Story time with Alexa.” It’s adorable.
Since the beginning of coronacation, you have become my walking partner. Beginning in the first seger we got into quite a nice routine of firstly davening together and then taking Gracie on the path. When things eased up and you were back at school it got changed to our Friday morning minhag. We walked on the path, or up the hill, to the makolet. You went in first while I watched Gracie and chose a treat and then I went in to pay for it and get the rest of the groceries. We had some fun, interesting and weird chats during those walks. And then we walked home together.
We also made up a bunch of silly songs on our travails. Here is one that I remember:
First is the fastest
Second is the nastiest
Third is the one with the hairy mask
Fourth is the trier
Fifth is the cryer
Sixth is the one who’s the hairy liar
Seven has the darts
Eight has the farts
Nine is the one with the hairy a**s
The other thing I love doing with you is craft projects. It’s always so cool how you love creating things as that’s what mummy loves doing also. And then of course on Friday night when you select a Mr. Men book for me to read. Even when I’m tired I still love that you do that. As you enjoy something that I enjoyed in my childhood so very much so it connects me back to that.
In the beginning of coronocation when you would speak to the grandparents on the phone I feared you were not going to be good on the phone. All you said was “yep,” about 10 times and then hung up. But – while it took a little time – now I can honestly say I’m proud of how you can hold a decent conversation with them. They love hearing from you.
You’re pretty smart Eitan. You also have an amazing poker face. You know when you’ve done wrong but you’re a determined little thing which can be both good and bad. Sometimes you are so dead set on getting what you want that you just refuse to let up. That can be pretty exhausting for mummy and daddy but at the same time, pretty impressive at how strong-willed you are. The only advice I would have is, keep with that for sure, but use it for the good. Use it to succeed. Apply it to your piano playing (which by the way is really improving); use it when you defend your friends and your brother (who you love so so much) and find a way for it to make people happy.
Eitan Aharon Sass, you’re a great son, an amazing grandson, a good friend and a loyal dog owner. Keep going just as you are and remember, you’re never too old for kisses and hugs. I love you so much!
My dear, wonderful, fun Eitan
As you approach your 12th year, I think back to when I was 11 and what I was like. And I quickly realize how much cooler you are than I was then and actually even how I am now.
You are smart, hilarious, nice, caring and curious. You have leadership skills and your friends love being with you. This year has been wonderful for me in particular as we have spent more time together than we normally would have done, thanks to ‘The Rona.’ You and I have done many KIWI Boxes together (well, let’s be honest; I’ve been your sous chef in getting the pieces you’ve needed for these great creations), we’ve played darts and air hockey, have taken Gracie on walks and – perhaps my favourite thing – your participation in Mommy’s Home Keytana this summer.
While I don’t know all that much about lego, I love to learn about it from you. I enjoy seeing your creations (both from books and your imagination) and I was particularly blown away by the city you made with Ariel on Yom Kippur (while fasting!!!) and the “our family” creation. I love how you always include Gracie in all of these crafts.
Talking of Gracie, she absolutely loves sleeping in your bed on your pillow. She has a very special connection with you and I’m sure that’s because you always make sure she is walked in the mornings, teacher her tricks and generally show her love. Thank you.
Remember some of the funny songs we made up about her on our walks with her on the path, past the sock bush? That was cool. And when you came with me on my walks to the seamstress during lockdown? I loved that.
But let’s get back to lego, and, more specifically, Legoland! Who would have thought that your mummy would have gotten so excited by the hotel? True, I’m not one for Adventure Parks (although I did enjoy the ride we all did together, making my own lego creations in the lego room in the park and the carousel and other kiddie rides I did by myself). BUT…my favourite part was hands down the hotel. I loved that I got to sleep in a Lego Ninjago bed and that there were lego pieces everywhere in the hotel. I loved meeting all the huge lego characters and having my pictures taken with them. But the main reason I loved all of that was because of you. I felt like I got a little glimpse into your world and I was able to enjoy something that is such an integral part of you. I felt happy that I was able to show you how much you mean to me in all facets, including lego that until now I’ve not appreciated as much. And I loved how much fun you had with it all.
Eitan, many times you truly shock me. The way you manage to make me feel good about things. Like you tell me what an amazing mummy I am. You get excited by the snacks I prepare for you even though we know they’re far from being award-winning creations! You love baking with me (even when I get frustrated!) and we all love the special daddy-Eitan challah recipe we have for shabbatot. I love how so much of your personality comes through with it all.
Shabbatots are great with you. Because of you I love doing the parsha. I also like how you always initiate the ‘Questions in the Jar’ and even though we groan about it, we all end up benefitting from it and enjoying it. It’s also great when your friends come over.
This last year – other than ‘the Rona’ madness – you dealt with Golan getting A LOT of attention for his seemingly endless barmitzvah celebrations. But, with your natural grace and unique personality, you made it look easy. So I hope and pray that the gifts and attention you’ve received on your 11th birthday have in some way made up for it.
I love you so much; happy birthday sweet one. Keep doing great things for the world.
As you approach your 12th year, I think back to when I was 11 and what I was like. And I quickly realize how much cooler you are than I was then and actually even how I am now.
You are smart, hilarious, nice, caring and curious. You have leadership skills and your friends love being with you. This year has been wonderful for me in particular as we have spent more time together than we normally would have done, thanks to ‘The Rona.’ You and I have done many KIWI Boxes together (well, let’s be honest; I’ve been your sous chef in getting the pieces you’ve needed for these great creations), we’ve played darts and air hockey, have taken Gracie on walks and – perhaps my favourite thing – your participation in Mommy’s Home Keytana this summer.
While I don’t know all that much about lego, I love to learn about it from you. I enjoy seeing your creations (both from books and your imagination) and I was particularly blown away by the city you made with Ariel on Yom Kippur (while fasting!!!) and the “our family” creation. I love how you always include Gracie in all of these crafts.
Talking of Gracie, she absolutely loves sleeping in your bed on your pillow. She has a very special connection with you and I’m sure that’s because you always make sure she is walked in the mornings, teacher her tricks and generally show her love. Thank you.
Remember some of the funny songs we made up about her on our walks with her on the path, past the sock bush? That was cool. And when you came with me on my walks to the seamstress during lockdown? I loved that.
But let’s get back to lego, and, more specifically, Legoland! Who would have thought that your mummy would have gotten so excited by the hotel? True, I’m not one for Adventure Parks (although I did enjoy the ride we all did together, making my own lego creations in the lego room in the park and the carousel and other kiddie rides I did by myself). BUT…my favourite part was hands down the hotel. I loved that I got to sleep in a Lego Ninjago bed and that there were lego pieces everywhere in the hotel. I loved meeting all the huge lego characters and having my pictures taken with them. But the main reason I loved all of that was because of you. I felt like I got a little glimpse into your world and I was able to enjoy something that is such an integral part of you. I felt happy that I was able to show you how much you mean to me in all facets, including lego that until now I’ve not appreciated as much. And I loved how much fun you had with it all.
Eitan, many times you truly shock me. The way you manage to make me feel good about things. Like you tell me what an amazing mummy I am. You get excited by the snacks I prepare for you even though we know they’re far from being award-winning creations! You love baking with me (even when I get frustrated!) and we all love the special daddy-Eitan challah recipe we have for shabbatot. I love how so much of your personality comes through with it all.
Shabbatots are great with you. Because of you I love doing the parsha. I also like how you always initiate the ‘Questions in the Jar’ and even though we groan about it, we all end up benefitting from it and enjoying it. It’s also great when your friends come over.
This last year – other than ‘the Rona’ madness – you dealt with Golan getting A LOT of attention for his seemingly endless barmitzvah celebrations. But, with your natural grace and unique personality, you made it look easy. So I hope and pray that the gifts and attention you’ve received on your 11th birthday have in some way made up for it.
I love you so much; happy birthday sweet one. Keep doing great things for the world.
My dear Eitan,
I want to wish you a very happy 12th birthday – just one year until you are officially a man…with a cellphone! I hope that this year is filled with many fun and wonderful experiences as reflecting who you are…fun and wonderful.
Eitan this year has been a little tough for mummy, losing papa. But your loving and kind behavior toward me has really helped. It also didn’t go amiss that you bought humor to the situation, which – apart from reminding me again how similar you are to your awesome daddy – actually helped. When we were at the levaya and I was told to find a stone by the ground where papa lay, you whispered in my ear ‘let’s just steal one from another grave.’ Truthfully, it wasn’t actually a bad solution! Which reminded me of another solution you offered up to us when we were in America last year, faced with the ‘corona’ drama and you suggested ‘let’s just pretend we took a test.’
You’re pretty creative when it comes to solutions actually. Sometimes your ideas are exceedingly funny and other times they’re pretty darn clever. Your memory of events either from a few months to many years ago continues to astound both daddy and I.
You went through a little challenge of your own this year too…you got glasses. True, you don’t wear them as much as you should but you showed maturity in choosing good frames (but let’s face it, everything looks great on you) and wearing them at times. Another challenge you had was dealing with a Math teacher who – how shall we put it diplomatically? – won’t be winning any awards any time soon. Despite that situation I hope you continue to thrive in this important subject that so much of your family tree has succeeded at.
Like every other year of your life so far, this one you’ve continued to make mummy and daddy incredibly happy and proud. There are so many stories to illustrate this but I think I’d like to just focus on two that really stood out. First, when we were at the shul kiddush all the kids – including you – grabbed a bunch of candy. However, on seeing that one of Rabbi Shlomo and Bina’s kids didn’t get you immediately sacrificed your own. Not only that, you didn’t even tell us what you’d done; we only found out from a phone-call. The second event was with Ezra Nagel. A new oleh you immediately took him under your wing first at olim camp and then at school, looking out for him and helping him integrate during this difficult time for him.
I guess what has impressed me most about these events is that you were good and modest; you didn’t even think to tell us what you did because you just know it is the right thing to do and I guess in your mind, behaving any other way, just isn’t acceptable. I’m proud of that.
You also joined the Scouts this year. While your first sleepover was a little challenging (and I sooooo wanted daddy to come and get you even though that wouldn’t have been a good idea) you stuck it out. Also, you worked hard to get your badges and with that you’ve shown commitment and dedication to a very good cause. We hope you are able to raise lots of money for the Scouts organization.
When we did the two Escape Rooms as a family (one in Haifa and the other in Paphos) you contributed so much! You used your smarts which we all know you have and successfully helped us navigate the situation.
Yesterday, Yom Kippur, you truly knocked it out of the park. A difficult day for even adults, not only did you manage to fast the entire time (without complaining) but you did something even mummy can’t do; you stayed in shul, davening with immense kavanah, with daddy and Golan. That alone would have been beyond special but the fact that you ended up wearing papa’s special Shabbat kippa and davening in his shul when he can no longer do so, added more pride for me and daddy. Added to that was that you impressed daddy’s friend Chaim Tugen so much that not only did he compliment daddy on what an amazing kid you are, but told him that had papa been in shul with you, he would have been beyond proud. I’ll let you into a little secret…papa was beyond proud…He was there, of that I’m sure.
Eitan, you have a ton of friends; everyone loves you, so much so that sometimes you feel it’s too much. People love being around you and that is no surprise to either mummy or daddy because you are fun, good natured, kind and caring. Indeed, if I was just a little younger I think I’d want to be your friend too!
Eitan my bracha this year to you is that you are able to continue doing amazing things, loving life, being a great friend and thriving in school.
I love you so so much
I want to wish you a very happy 12th birthday – just one year until you are officially a man…with a cellphone! I hope that this year is filled with many fun and wonderful experiences as reflecting who you are…fun and wonderful.
Eitan this year has been a little tough for mummy, losing papa. But your loving and kind behavior toward me has really helped. It also didn’t go amiss that you bought humor to the situation, which – apart from reminding me again how similar you are to your awesome daddy – actually helped. When we were at the levaya and I was told to find a stone by the ground where papa lay, you whispered in my ear ‘let’s just steal one from another grave.’ Truthfully, it wasn’t actually a bad solution! Which reminded me of another solution you offered up to us when we were in America last year, faced with the ‘corona’ drama and you suggested ‘let’s just pretend we took a test.’
You’re pretty creative when it comes to solutions actually. Sometimes your ideas are exceedingly funny and other times they’re pretty darn clever. Your memory of events either from a few months to many years ago continues to astound both daddy and I.
You went through a little challenge of your own this year too…you got glasses. True, you don’t wear them as much as you should but you showed maturity in choosing good frames (but let’s face it, everything looks great on you) and wearing them at times. Another challenge you had was dealing with a Math teacher who – how shall we put it diplomatically? – won’t be winning any awards any time soon. Despite that situation I hope you continue to thrive in this important subject that so much of your family tree has succeeded at.
Like every other year of your life so far, this one you’ve continued to make mummy and daddy incredibly happy and proud. There are so many stories to illustrate this but I think I’d like to just focus on two that really stood out. First, when we were at the shul kiddush all the kids – including you – grabbed a bunch of candy. However, on seeing that one of Rabbi Shlomo and Bina’s kids didn’t get you immediately sacrificed your own. Not only that, you didn’t even tell us what you’d done; we only found out from a phone-call. The second event was with Ezra Nagel. A new oleh you immediately took him under your wing first at olim camp and then at school, looking out for him and helping him integrate during this difficult time for him.
I guess what has impressed me most about these events is that you were good and modest; you didn’t even think to tell us what you did because you just know it is the right thing to do and I guess in your mind, behaving any other way, just isn’t acceptable. I’m proud of that.
You also joined the Scouts this year. While your first sleepover was a little challenging (and I sooooo wanted daddy to come and get you even though that wouldn’t have been a good idea) you stuck it out. Also, you worked hard to get your badges and with that you’ve shown commitment and dedication to a very good cause. We hope you are able to raise lots of money for the Scouts organization.
When we did the two Escape Rooms as a family (one in Haifa and the other in Paphos) you contributed so much! You used your smarts which we all know you have and successfully helped us navigate the situation.
Yesterday, Yom Kippur, you truly knocked it out of the park. A difficult day for even adults, not only did you manage to fast the entire time (without complaining) but you did something even mummy can’t do; you stayed in shul, davening with immense kavanah, with daddy and Golan. That alone would have been beyond special but the fact that you ended up wearing papa’s special Shabbat kippa and davening in his shul when he can no longer do so, added more pride for me and daddy. Added to that was that you impressed daddy’s friend Chaim Tugen so much that not only did he compliment daddy on what an amazing kid you are, but told him that had papa been in shul with you, he would have been beyond proud. I’ll let you into a little secret…papa was beyond proud…He was there, of that I’m sure.
Eitan, you have a ton of friends; everyone loves you, so much so that sometimes you feel it’s too much. People love being around you and that is no surprise to either mummy or daddy because you are fun, good natured, kind and caring. Indeed, if I was just a little younger I think I’d want to be your friend too!
Eitan my bracha this year to you is that you are able to continue doing amazing things, loving life, being a great friend and thriving in school.
I love you so so much
My dear Eitan
Today you are 13, the day on which according to Jewish law, you are a man. Well, I don’t know quite about that but the growth in maturity you have undergone this past year is quite staggering and just increases mummy and daddy’s pride in you.
Eitan, throughout your life you’ve been incredibly loved not only by friends and family but also by strangers. You somehow give off the most wonderful energy which people can’t help but magnetize to. I’m so glad you have this trait.
So what’s happened over the last 12 months? Well, you began learning for your barmitzvah parsha with the wonderful Marty. From day one you connected to him immediately and him to you and he’s truly spent the last few months just raving about your smarts, but more importantly (as you know for daddy and me) your incredible, outstanding middot.
And he’s not the only one. Neighbors, parents of friends, teachers and others have either written or called daddy and me to tell us about you doing something nice for them, or how they watched you behave kindly to others. Wow I wish you knew just half of how proud that makes us of you.
You’ve also continued to take an active role in the Scouts, displaying tremendous amounts of responsibility and care for those in your charge. And talking of responsibility, your care and concern for Gracie knows no bounds. Your love for her is limitless and we know by watching her sleep with her head on the pillow next to you just how much she appreciates this.
Eitan, for the first time in your life you spent 7 weeks without your big brother Golan. While of course we know you missed him a ton, you fared pretty damn well without him. But let me tell you this…mummy and daddy were sooooooo glad you were home and it felt like we had the most amazing opportunity to spend more quality time with you. Thank you for that.
Just last month you started the Hemshech at Derech Avot. You’ve only been there a few weeks but you are already making your mark. From your mechanech (Gilead) to your English teacher (the spectacular Sherry) you are fast developing a reputation for being smart, hard working and of course, deadpan funny.
Eitan we want you to keep up all these traits we have spoken about. But we also want you to constantly be thinking strategically about how to create the right balance we all of this. We are so excited for your barmitzvah and can’t wait to see what you do next. We love you.
Today you are 13, the day on which according to Jewish law, you are a man. Well, I don’t know quite about that but the growth in maturity you have undergone this past year is quite staggering and just increases mummy and daddy’s pride in you.
Eitan, throughout your life you’ve been incredibly loved not only by friends and family but also by strangers. You somehow give off the most wonderful energy which people can’t help but magnetize to. I’m so glad you have this trait.
So what’s happened over the last 12 months? Well, you began learning for your barmitzvah parsha with the wonderful Marty. From day one you connected to him immediately and him to you and he’s truly spent the last few months just raving about your smarts, but more importantly (as you know for daddy and me) your incredible, outstanding middot.
And he’s not the only one. Neighbors, parents of friends, teachers and others have either written or called daddy and me to tell us about you doing something nice for them, or how they watched you behave kindly to others. Wow I wish you knew just half of how proud that makes us of you.
You’ve also continued to take an active role in the Scouts, displaying tremendous amounts of responsibility and care for those in your charge. And talking of responsibility, your care and concern for Gracie knows no bounds. Your love for her is limitless and we know by watching her sleep with her head on the pillow next to you just how much she appreciates this.
Eitan, for the first time in your life you spent 7 weeks without your big brother Golan. While of course we know you missed him a ton, you fared pretty damn well without him. But let me tell you this…mummy and daddy were sooooooo glad you were home and it felt like we had the most amazing opportunity to spend more quality time with you. Thank you for that.
Just last month you started the Hemshech at Derech Avot. You’ve only been there a few weeks but you are already making your mark. From your mechanech (Gilead) to your English teacher (the spectacular Sherry) you are fast developing a reputation for being smart, hard working and of course, deadpan funny.
Eitan we want you to keep up all these traits we have spoken about. But we also want you to constantly be thinking strategically about how to create the right balance we all of this. We are so excited for your barmitzvah and can’t wait to see what you do next. We love you.
My dear Eitan Aaron Sass, today you put on papa’s tefillin, a huge milestone. One of my very first memories of papa is sitting on the couch in the lounge, watching him put on his tefillin, more than 40 years ago in Broadhurst Avenue, Edgware, England. And now here you are, not only in Eretz Yisrael, but at Maarat Hamechpela committing to this incredibly important mitzvah. Maarat Hamechpela: the place where our forefathers who are buried here – according to the Midrash – also put on tefillin. This fact alone connects you to both of your grandfathers – papa whose tefillin you are using and Saba whose Hebrew name is Avraham. What a legacy.
Eitan, while we are of course disappointed that papa didn’t live to see this very special day, we do believe he is thrilled that you are carrying on this important mitzvah and his legacy through it.
While only 10% of the world is left-handed, both you and papa fall into that category. It’s interesting to note that while most mitzvot require the right hand to be used, we learn from the Shulchan Aruch that the mitzvah of tefillin invokes the use of the left arm. In Orach Chayim 206 we read:
כל דבר שמברך עליו לאכלו או להריח בו צריך לאוחזו בימינו כשהוא מברך:
Anything that is blessed to be eaten or smelled should be held during the day when he blesses
In Judaism, the left side is traditionally associated with the midah of din (judgement) while the right side is associated with the midah of chessed (lovingkindness). The left side is also connected to gevurah(heroism). The binding of the תפילין של יד is said to bring remind us of Akeidat Yitzchak. During this event Avraham bound Yitzchak putting him at the top of the mizbeach and before he went to slaughter him Yitzchak asked him to tie his hands and feet. What does this have to do with the תפילין של יד? According to the Zohar (Bereishit 23a) the entire purpose of Akeidat Yitzchak was to lessen the impact of the ‘midat hadin’ connected with the left side and Yitzchak and in so doing, to enhance the ‘midat hachesed’ associated with the right side and Avraham for generations to come. So with the binding of Yitzchak, Avraham was able to subdue midat hadin and elevate midat hachesed which is what – it is hoped – Hashem does for you when you put on tefillin.
תפילין של יד is placed specifically on the left arm which rests against the heart (the pinnacle of the emotions) and תפילין ראש on the head, above the forehead, (where the upper part of the brain is found). This enables us to focus on the head, heart and hand teaching us to dedicate ourselves to avodat Hashem through everything; how we think, feel and do and that we shouldn’t be ruled JUST by either the heart or the head. As Shimshon Raphael Hirsch so eloquently said of tefillin: "A truth, in order to produce results, must be impressed upon the mind and heart again and again."
Eitan, there are many messages and values mummy and daddy try to give over to you as your parents. But those that we believe will help you to become a better and more connected Jew and someone who feels good about themselves in life is to achieve the correct balance between the head and the heart as you strive to do the right thing. You are already showing us that you are very much on this path and we couldn’t be prouder of you. I love you and Mazal Tov!
Eitan, while we are of course disappointed that papa didn’t live to see this very special day, we do believe he is thrilled that you are carrying on this important mitzvah and his legacy through it.
While only 10% of the world is left-handed, both you and papa fall into that category. It’s interesting to note that while most mitzvot require the right hand to be used, we learn from the Shulchan Aruch that the mitzvah of tefillin invokes the use of the left arm. In Orach Chayim 206 we read:
כל דבר שמברך עליו לאכלו או להריח בו צריך לאוחזו בימינו כשהוא מברך:
Anything that is blessed to be eaten or smelled should be held during the day when he blesses
In Judaism, the left side is traditionally associated with the midah of din (judgement) while the right side is associated with the midah of chessed (lovingkindness). The left side is also connected to gevurah(heroism). The binding of the תפילין של יד is said to bring remind us of Akeidat Yitzchak. During this event Avraham bound Yitzchak putting him at the top of the mizbeach and before he went to slaughter him Yitzchak asked him to tie his hands and feet. What does this have to do with the תפילין של יד? According to the Zohar (Bereishit 23a) the entire purpose of Akeidat Yitzchak was to lessen the impact of the ‘midat hadin’ connected with the left side and Yitzchak and in so doing, to enhance the ‘midat hachesed’ associated with the right side and Avraham for generations to come. So with the binding of Yitzchak, Avraham was able to subdue midat hadin and elevate midat hachesed which is what – it is hoped – Hashem does for you when you put on tefillin.
תפילין של יד is placed specifically on the left arm which rests against the heart (the pinnacle of the emotions) and תפילין ראש on the head, above the forehead, (where the upper part of the brain is found). This enables us to focus on the head, heart and hand teaching us to dedicate ourselves to avodat Hashem through everything; how we think, feel and do and that we shouldn’t be ruled JUST by either the heart or the head. As Shimshon Raphael Hirsch so eloquently said of tefillin: "A truth, in order to produce results, must be impressed upon the mind and heart again and again."
Eitan, there are many messages and values mummy and daddy try to give over to you as your parents. But those that we believe will help you to become a better and more connected Jew and someone who feels good about themselves in life is to achieve the correct balance between the head and the heart as you strive to do the right thing. You are already showing us that you are very much on this path and we couldn’t be prouder of you. I love you and Mazal Tov!
My dear Eitan,
Well I have to say until a few days ago I had a very, very different devar Torah planned for today. But as the old saying goes, ‘man [or in this case woman] plans and Hashem laughs.’ Although I firmly believe Hashem is not laughing right now…just silently crying with us but at the same time taking pride and having nachat at this truly beautiful scene of His children here…how many people came out to celebrate none other than YOU…wonderful, strong, beautiful YOU. And that makes me smile a lot through the brokenness.
We just listened as you read – so beautifully – from the Torah for the very first time at one of the holiest places in the world. There was another astonishing first today as well. It’s the first parsha in the first Sefer of the entire Torah. And then there was a first that was a little sadder…the first (and only) grandson barmitzvah that papa was not zocheh to be here for. And boy would he have been the proudest person on earth.
The very first pasuk you read today was:
וַיֹּ֣אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֗ים יִקָּו֨וּ הַמַּ֜יִם מִתַּ֤חַת הַשָּׁמַ֨יִם֙ אֶל־מָק֣וֹם אֶחָ֔ד וְתֵֽרָאֶ֖ה הַיַּבָּשָׁ֑ה וַֽיְהִי־כֵֽן. וַיִּקְרָ֨א אֱלֹהִ֤ים לַיַּבָּשָׁה֙ אֶ֔רֶץ וּלְמִקְוֵ֥ה הַמַּ֖יִם קָרָ֣א יַמִּ֑ים וַיַּ֥רְא אֱלֹהִ֖ים כִּי־טֽוֹב
And Hashem said, "Let the water that is beneath the heavens gather into one place, and let the dry land appear," and it was so. And Hashem called the dry land earth, and the gathering of the waters He called seas, and God saw that it was good. (1: 9-13)
Well, I had gathered a bunch of different commentators who had ideas on these pasukim but none of them were alive during these times. The only thing I can say now on this is the following: wow, if Hashem could separate land from water, you better believe He can bring our chayalim home to safety, stop the brutality of the enemy and make Israel a stronger nation than its ever been before.
Eitan, you read the part of the Torah that tells us about the story of Creation, specifically the third day. As you may or may not know, out of all the days Hashem created, the third day – Tuesday – was the only one where the word טוב – good – is used twice. Why though? What was more special about the third day over all the other days? Rashi explains: the second day the word טוב was not used because the creation of the water was only completed the following day so they couldn’t say טוב until the water had been created in its entirety.
What does that tell us? It’s not like Hashem wasn’t able to finish it. The Shemen HaTov brings a beautiful idea that Hashem is telling us that sometimes we have to wait. What an amazing lesson for us all for right now. Everything seems so bad now. But with Hashem’s help, a little patience, and a lot of tefilot, I hope we merit to see the end which will be for the good.
Eitan, even though you’re only 13 you’ve had encounters in life that have taught you the importance of waiting; think challah baking (with the yeast rising), lego building (waiting til the next morning when you’re less tired to continue a project) and even learning for your barmitzvah (all those hours of practice that took time which ultimately got you to the perfection we witnessed today). Life is the same. But sometimes – like right now – it’s so hard to really internalize that lesson.
I’ve learned so much from your daddy about the benefits of being patient and I hope you will learn that lesson too. My bracha for you on this very momentous occasion is that you learn to wait for the story (of your life) to unfold; of seeing – on whatever level you can – that Hashem has a truly Good plan for us all and, in as much as you can, of enjoying the ride while you do it. From what I’ve seen of you so far, I have no doubt that you will. You’re awesome; Mazal Tov!
My dear Eitan, I cannot believe that your barmitzvah shabbat is finally here. Like my devar torah to you at the kotel you yesterday, this speech has undergone quite the edit too. Despite all that we’ve lost this week and all the losses we dread are still to come, we still have so much for which to be grateful. It’s true that the original special thank-yous I was going to focus on were for your wonderful aunt, uncle and cousins from Irvine but while I can’t thank them for being physically here I can still extend my gratitude to them for their huge efforts to get here and for the love they’ve shown to us all. In terms of thanking those for being here now, we are again saved by Jo and Jonah and the incredible Miri, whose love and commitment to us all knows no bounds. Guys, it’s unbelievable how you turn our potentially disastrous smachot into events of beauty, love and generosity.
There are many other thank-yous as well, a couple more of which I’ll mention now. Saba and Savta you guys are just outstanding. We are so grateful for everything you do for our family and for being such a huge presence in our lives. Daniel and I are also so indebted to have you guys as incredible role models for creating a beautiful, happy marriage that our kids can see and learn from and hopefully carry on as well. And since you just seem to age backwards, even being over 80 you still have more energy than people half your age. Our children are incredibly blessed to have such grandparents.
Mum, I know this hasn’t been an easy few years for you at all. But you continue to surpass our expectations, making us all proud on a daily basis. From your twice daily swim to taking up an art class in your eighth decade (and producing some beautiful pieces I might add) to inviting people for Friday night dinners and doing it all on your own I can honestly say that I am proud as punch to call you my mum. And I know you made some true efforts to get here for Eitan’s barmitzvah which means so much to us all. Thank you.
Of course, as we all know, there is someone incredibly special who was not able to make it to your barmitzvah Eitan. Your papa. Your papa whose tefillin you’ve been putting on so beautifully over the last month. Your papa whose kippah you have been wearing. Your wonderful, dear, strong papa who fought against such a horrible disease. My dad.
Chayim ben Yishaya Meir z”l was a real trooper. Throughout his life he approached everything he did with strength, determination and a kind of quiet, understated, heroic bravery. This was fine during his first 75 years but when he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s the true challenge set in. Eitan, papa was so very strong that, knowing there was something wrong, rather than discuss the matter with grandma, Neil or I, or even a friend, he just got up, went to the doctor and didn’t even tell anyone what had transpired.
As you know when we called you Eitan it was for two simple reasons: one, we liked the name and two because you had demonstrated real strength and fortitude in the womb. Well, guess what? It turns out that the Hebrew root of your name – ‘eyt’ – as well as meaning strength also means resilience. How resilient your papa was. Eyt also means ‘spiritual strength’ and even though not an outwardly devoutly religious man, we know how much tefilah, tefillin and shul meant to papa. But what some of us don’t know is that when I myself was going through a hard time, papa simply said to me: ‘Emma, no matter what is going on, you will always have your faith.’ Well, I certainly tried but I’m not sure I did as well as papa did when faced with his tests.
The third meaning of the name Eitan is ‘long lived,’ which I think is also extremely fitting. Baruch Hashem papa did indeed live a long life, but more importantly his very name was just that – Chayim, life.
One more point on your papa’s namesake. The gematria of Chayim is 628 which is the same as that for the phrase:
אהיה חבר ממש טוב
Which means – I will be a really good friend. They say that man’s best friend is a dog and we see how you make Gracie feel. In addition, just as we are all so proud of what an amazing friend you continue to be to so many people, I know that papa – as the very sociable person he was – would be proud too.
Eitan, papa may not be here physically in this room but I have no doubt that he’s here somewhere…(probably going to the freezer for some ice-cream) along with your 3 other outstanding grandparents who we feel so blessed are able to join in your simcha.
Eitan, I know I say it all the time but it’s because it’s the truth; you are such an incredible human being, with such a dry sense of humor and a kind, caring heart. While we know so much of what goes on in Golan’s head you continue to keep us guessing. But given how often we get reports from friends and teachers about your middot, kindness and smarts, I guess you can continue to keep us guessing…just make sure you let Golan in on what’s going on in that brilliant brain of yours once in a while!
I love you beyond words and can’t wait to see what you do next. Mazal Tov
There are many other thank-yous as well, a couple more of which I’ll mention now. Saba and Savta you guys are just outstanding. We are so grateful for everything you do for our family and for being such a huge presence in our lives. Daniel and I are also so indebted to have you guys as incredible role models for creating a beautiful, happy marriage that our kids can see and learn from and hopefully carry on as well. And since you just seem to age backwards, even being over 80 you still have more energy than people half your age. Our children are incredibly blessed to have such grandparents.
Mum, I know this hasn’t been an easy few years for you at all. But you continue to surpass our expectations, making us all proud on a daily basis. From your twice daily swim to taking up an art class in your eighth decade (and producing some beautiful pieces I might add) to inviting people for Friday night dinners and doing it all on your own I can honestly say that I am proud as punch to call you my mum. And I know you made some true efforts to get here for Eitan’s barmitzvah which means so much to us all. Thank you.
Of course, as we all know, there is someone incredibly special who was not able to make it to your barmitzvah Eitan. Your papa. Your papa whose tefillin you’ve been putting on so beautifully over the last month. Your papa whose kippah you have been wearing. Your wonderful, dear, strong papa who fought against such a horrible disease. My dad.
Chayim ben Yishaya Meir z”l was a real trooper. Throughout his life he approached everything he did with strength, determination and a kind of quiet, understated, heroic bravery. This was fine during his first 75 years but when he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s the true challenge set in. Eitan, papa was so very strong that, knowing there was something wrong, rather than discuss the matter with grandma, Neil or I, or even a friend, he just got up, went to the doctor and didn’t even tell anyone what had transpired.
As you know when we called you Eitan it was for two simple reasons: one, we liked the name and two because you had demonstrated real strength and fortitude in the womb. Well, guess what? It turns out that the Hebrew root of your name – ‘eyt’ – as well as meaning strength also means resilience. How resilient your papa was. Eyt also means ‘spiritual strength’ and even though not an outwardly devoutly religious man, we know how much tefilah, tefillin and shul meant to papa. But what some of us don’t know is that when I myself was going through a hard time, papa simply said to me: ‘Emma, no matter what is going on, you will always have your faith.’ Well, I certainly tried but I’m not sure I did as well as papa did when faced with his tests.
The third meaning of the name Eitan is ‘long lived,’ which I think is also extremely fitting. Baruch Hashem papa did indeed live a long life, but more importantly his very name was just that – Chayim, life.
One more point on your papa’s namesake. The gematria of Chayim is 628 which is the same as that for the phrase:
אהיה חבר ממש טוב
Which means – I will be a really good friend. They say that man’s best friend is a dog and we see how you make Gracie feel. In addition, just as we are all so proud of what an amazing friend you continue to be to so many people, I know that papa – as the very sociable person he was – would be proud too.
Eitan, papa may not be here physically in this room but I have no doubt that he’s here somewhere…(probably going to the freezer for some ice-cream) along with your 3 other outstanding grandparents who we feel so blessed are able to join in your simcha.
Eitan, I know I say it all the time but it’s because it’s the truth; you are such an incredible human being, with such a dry sense of humor and a kind, caring heart. While we know so much of what goes on in Golan’s head you continue to keep us guessing. But given how often we get reports from friends and teachers about your middot, kindness and smarts, I guess you can continue to keep us guessing…just make sure you let Golan in on what’s going on in that brilliant brain of yours once in a while!
I love you beyond words and can’t wait to see what you do next. Mazal Tov